With Time
by dontplaywithlove
Summary: Mai Taniyama; cutter, mentally unstable and the girl who fears everything. Life has a few twists and turns for her and death has a couple tricks up it's sleeve. With time, everything will come into play.
1. How Different

**Rinny: Well, this is officially my first story. I had something else in mind and started but I ended up not liking it. Hopefully I can rewrite it and turn it into my second story! That would be amazing. Well anyway, here goes the first story and I hope you like it. It's a bit OOC but that's how I planned it. I forewarn you, some characters **_**will **_**be acting a bit different than usual. **

**Mai: Alright who cares? Get on with the story.**

**Rinny: …You're so mean. **

**Mai: Yeah and cupid is a baby. Duh.**

**Rinny: …**

**Mai: Disclaimer- dontplaywithlove does not own Ghost Hunt or anything within the content of these chapters other than the fact that she wrote it.**

***With Time***

**Chapter One- ****How Different**

I looked around nervously, eyes flittering around the room. I attempt to busy myself by digging my nails into my wrists. It stings and my skin slowly becomes a light scarlet color. I pay no mind to it and focus more on the pain. Focus on how it lets me know I'm still here, living, breathing and feeling. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm awake or asleep, or dead or alive. The fear I have growing inside eats away at me as though _I _were a decomposed body and _it_ was a pack of vultures and flies. I unconsciously shiver and sink my teeth into my bottom lip, breaking skin.

"Mai."

I snap out of my reverie and gradually my eyes trail upwards. Kit gives me a funny look and I release myself from the pain. The sensations still linger. I continue to gaze into her auburn orbs until she speaks.

"Can you talk today?"

The question is not new to me. There are days when my voice will hide. When I cannot speak aloud, but in my thoughts only. I let out a small breath and search inside myself. My throat opens slightly and I just barely allow my lips to part before a gentle, "Hi, Kit," comes tumbling out. I blink and she follows suit, letting a warm smile grace her lips.

"That's good," she tells me. It's always what she tells me. 'That's good, Mai,' or, 'Maybe next time, Mai'. But I don't mind.

In return I stand up carefully and grab the white plastic food market bag off of my desk. Every day for lunch I digest the same thing. In fact, it was the only thing I was able to stomach without puking, thinking of…them. My stomach flips and I hold out from letting my thoughts stray. Kit knows this and has stopped offering me anything else. She also knows it isn't healthy for me, that I'm not getting enough nutrition, but she doesn't say anything. She knows that _I _know it as well.

I keep my face neutral but soft, innocently gripping the back of my best friend's sweater with two fingers. I trail behind her, holding the food market bag at my side in my left hand. Kit is used to my touch by now. It is the same to me. The feathery feel of her clothes, the silky touch of her pale skin, the way the smell of vanilla follows her everywhere. Scripted into my hands and floating around in my head, I have the girl in front of me completely memorized. She recognizes me, too. My hands always clammy, eyes darting in every direction, the way I shake for no reason at random moments, the aroma of fear and cotton candy I carry, and the melon scent that wafts through my mouth. We surround each other. We need each other. Kit is my other half and I am hers. She holds me together. She keeps me sane.

My sanity should be well thought over, judged. I have a fair share of breakdowns, meltdowns, panic attacks and on special occasions, a seizure. It is all controlled and caused by the past that haunts me and the feelings I cannot shed.

Kit stops and I bump into her back. I lower my hand but before it makes it back to my side, it is entangled in Kit's as she leads me to the back of the school. Secluded and alone, a small forest in front of it, our backs to the school building, to the world. We continue to walk until we're facing the autumn trees. I slide down against the pure white wall, pulling my knees against my chest. The color is faded now, more of a light grey if anything. I remain quiet. Kit takes the bag from my hands and opens it, handing me a clear plastic wrapped, creamy orange bun. Melon bread. My eyes twinkle and I begin to relax, taking the bread from her hands. Staring intently, I initiate unwrapping my lunch, leisurely balling up the plastic and sticking it in the food market bag. The crimson haired girl next to me watches and I turn to her. I will not start eating until after her, and she is aware of that as well. Once more she flashes me a bright smile and opens her bento. Taking hold of the chopsticks, she separates them, resulting in a small 'crack'.

"I'm going to eat now. Thank you for the food."

With her left hand, Kit places her chopsticks between her fingers and uses it to claim a small portion of rice. Happily, she chomps down and giggles. "It's good." She nods for me to eat, too, but I can't. I look at her face, transfixed, observing the off track rice along her cheeks. She blinks as I lean towards her and shakily wipe it away. Kit blushes in embarrassment. I real back to my spot and hug my knees, nibbling on melon bread.

"T-thank you," she mumbles, biting back into her own lunch. I nod my head. We eat silently, staring off into space. It was the good silence though. The friendly type.

I finally decide to speak, "Kit."

She glances my way and I take that as an okay to talk. Normally I'm rather quiet, so whenever I do talk, Kit is all ears. She tells me I have a pretty voice anyway. I think that's too nice.

My words come out barely over a loud whisper, fragile, "I'm going to get a job." This causes my friend to freeze.

Us two met two years ago. I was fifteen then and fresh out of a job. It was maybe a two or three weeks after…after _that man_ left. The money I had been saving up in case of emergency was out and I didn't know what to do. I was an emotional wreck. I hadn't gone to school the entire week, picked up a single call –I'd eventually unplugged the phone from the wall- or even left my apartment, for that matter. I would try to leave, but ended up breaking down before I left the door. Everything would remind me of _them_. I thought I would be strong and get over it, but it was easier said than done. I had lost all contact with my 'family' and if anyone came to visit, I made it appear as if no one was home. The pain I felt inside was unbearable. I was lifeless and drained, and I so badly wanted _him _to know that. No matter how much anger I put into him leaving, I couldn't be mad, I couldn't get over him. I wanted him back here in Japan, but I knew…I knew it wasn't possible. So I just stopped getting out of bed. I just lay there, only getting up to go to the bathroom. I stopped eating and after two days began to hurl. I accidently cut myself once on a glass I dropped and felt that the pain was rather pleasant. It hurt but I didn't mind it. My body craved more of it, and that's when I became a cutter. I thrived off of my knives. Anything sharp. I'd start by pressing the tip into my skin and slowly pushing more into until I'd draw blood. Just that was enough until soon I needed more. I'd hack away at my wrists, drawing pictures with my blood and trailing my knife up and down my arms, making sure to go deeper and faster with every second. One day I almost collapsed from blood loss. Luckily that day my land lord came by to pick up rent and found me, rushed me to a hospital. I would be dead now if it weren't for her. That's when my dreams started. I'd experience death after death after death. Every nap, every day dream. It was all so real. The pain, the fear, everything felt like a reality inside my mind. It was followed by my first seizure, then some panic attacks, a break down at more than one point in time and soon I was just living a nightmare. I would have much rather have been dead back then. But that wasn't the worst of it. Gene. He soon started reappearing in my dreams. I'd freak and think it was Naru. I'd cry, I'd scream, I'd be so _frightened _on the inside. It was too much. I was practically living in the hospital by then. And then…then I met Kit. She was a patient in the mental ward- which was where I had been transferred to. Kit was my roommate. At first she wouldn't talk. She was very happy for a mental case. Normally she'd smile and laugh or frown and watch me freak out in the room, going into panic mode. After the first time she watched me break down, I realized why she wasn't talking or saying anything. Kit mentally couldn't speak. Someone harmed her in some way which resulted in the fact that she just couldn't talk anymore. Well, she could, but she also _couldn't_. She calmed me down better than all the doctors after that. I trusted her. I really, really trusted her. She would hold me or tell me stories with her hands and that's what kept me pretty stable. I learned a lot about her in the amount of time we were together in there. She was an orphan, like me. Her parents died in a freak accident on a plane when she was my age. She had no family to go to and was put into a foster family's home where she was beaten and abused until she escaped and came here. The hospital let her in seeing as how she was so…unhinged. Kit had been there for three years by the time I joined rooms with her. After two weeks of staying with Kit, she began to talk. It was a miracle, the doctors say. Kit was never supposed to utter another word. I guess I changed that. We were close. Eventually Kit was let out but she refused to leave without me. She was 18 years old so a legal adult and came up with the idea to adopt me. It was no easy task but after a month or two it was settled and Kit and I lived together in my old apartment. The government refused to pay for our social security, insurance or anything else because of the fact that Kit was an adult. We made it by though. Just barely. Kit went to work at two different jobs and I did the cleaning, grocery shopping and cooking. Normally Kit came with when I went shopping because I couldn't handle it on my own. Kit was back to normal again whereas I was still as mental as before, but contained by my companion. It's been two years since and now I am almost eighteen and kit is twenty. I attend school and Kit decided to go not only for me, but for the education she's lost. We are both fourth years in high school. I'm still a cutter secretly, though I figure Kit knows about that, too.

That was the story of how Kit and I came to be. Now we are inseparable, a pair that will not be split.

"No." Was Kit's automatic response. I remained apathetic. Of course, I had been expecting that answer. Kit doesn't want me to work. I'm too frail. I could see something that would trigger a memory and I'd cause a scene. My headaches could start, I could collapse. Kit knows almost everything about me. I am but an open book to her. She's never forced information from me but gives me the time to tell her on my own. I give her a blank stare. Kit does so much for me, for my sake. I think…no, I know I need to step it up. I need to help her more.

"Kit, I have to."

She shakes her head frantically and takes another clumsy bite or rice. "No- No, Mai. I'm not- you're not going to work. If I have to, I'll get another job."

I am unphased. "Your already working two j-jobs," I take a breath. I haven't spoken this much in a while. "We…n-need the money." She just shakes her head more. She has refused to look at me now.

"No. You could-"

Emotion. It begins to rise in me but I force it down, knowing quite well what will happen if I let my feelings get the best of me. I cut her off, "I know." My face is flushed just from saying it and I inhale. Shock registers on Kit's face. She pales. I keep going. "I know, Kit… But you cannot- you cannot keep doing things on your- your own," I say slowly. I'm on my knees, wobbling to stay up.

Suddenly I feel guilty. Kit has a pained look in her eyes and I know I've hurt her.

"I'm…sorry," is all I can muster. She frowns and opens her mouth. After a second she closes it only to re-open it. "No. Mai, your right. I'm sorry. I know your used to doing things on your own so me being here is different, and I know you want to help but I'm…I'm so afraid, Mai." Her voice is barely audible now and she looks off into the sky. "Afraid you'll be hurt. This world is not a nice one and the last thing I want is-"

"Is for me…to get hurt." I lift the corners of my lips and place my hand over hers. "I can handle anything, Kit. I've been through a lot and surely I can m-manage this." I gaze back to the older girl to find her looking straight at me, a small smile on her face.

"Okay," she says. My eyes widen. "You can get a job…but only at a place I prove fit, okay?" I don't know what to say so I just nod. "Thank you, sweetheart," she pats my head and I close my eyes, savoring her touch. Just like Okaa-san...

Kit waves to me and hops off to her classroom. Unfortunately I am in class 4-B while she is in 4-A. I lay one arm against my chest and the other opens the door to the classroom. The talkative students suddenly go quiet after the realization of who has entered dawns on them. I cringe. It's all pity. I hear the whispers from behind me. I feel their gazes penetrating my back. I know. Sometimes, it's like I can hear their thoughts. I'm not sure if I'm imagining it or what, but I know I hear something other than a regular voice from afar.

I shuffle to my seat remaining passive. Mai Taniyama…the once bright and cheery and all-that-other-fluffy-stuff girl. Now I'm Mai Taniyama, the girl who cares for others, is completely alone besides Kit, un-talkative, afraid of everything, a cutter and mental case. The only similarity between the me now and the me from before is I'm still kind hearted… I'm greatly appreciative to still have that trait. It feels like it's the only part of _me_ that is still _me_. I'm glad to not be cold hearted. Cold hearted… I stop walking and my breath speeds up slightly. Now I am panting. I shut my eyes and use the trick Kit taught me to try and calm down.

"_Mai." I frown. The girl with the red hair sighs and motions me to come closer. I am hesitant but find myself scooting towards the girl. She taps the seat beside her so I sit. "We both know that it's getting a little out of control." I nod slowly, digesting her words. My eyes widen before returning to regular size. I have had more than three break downs in the last week. That wasn't good. Kit has noticed. Suddenly I am wary of every word that comes off her mouth. My hearing is keener and I am paying attention to what she has to say. "I know it's hard for you. I understand how difficult it is to control yourself. But do you think if maybe I showed you a way to be more careful, you would give it a try?" I am confused. Control? Never before would I have thought I could 'control' it. My emotions were an entangled mess, mixed with my thoughts and fears and everything else going on in my brain. The thought to prevent freaking out has never even occurred. I tilt my head, anxious to hear more. Kit nods and goes on, "This always worked for me back when…when I was being hit. I was scared and in pain. The only way I could endure it was to count." I furrowed my brows. How on earth could counting help me? "Here let me explain. When you start to become overwhelmed by your feelings just close your eyes and count. Count all the way to one hundred if you have to- or even further, Mai." She smiled. "The counting gives you something to pay attention to and changes the course of your minds thoughts. Like for me. If I would count, it was almost as though I could disappear inside my head while I was…you know." I start to comprehend what she's saying and nod. "Will you try that for me, Mai-chan?" I agree. It was better than nothing._

I let out a steady breath of air. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. I stop.

My eyes flutter open and I exhale again. Better. I like using this technique. It helps me. Only once before has it not worked. I trust it as much as I trust Kit. I look around and notice a few kids staring at my hand and murmuring to each other. I look down. Ah.

Blood. A small amount trickles down from my palm to the floor. I blink and unclench my fist. I guess I had been pressing my nails into my hand. My head turn upwards and some give me sad glances. I turn my head.

"Mai? Mai?"

An unfamiliar voice calls to me. I look behind me to see a girl with dark blue braids and large, olive green eyes. She smiles and gently takes my wrist, examining my hand. "It isn't too deep. How about I take you to the nurse and we'll get it wrapped?" I stare at her, perplexed. Something about her hangs around my head but I can't quite figure out what. She notes me staring and smiles like a Cheshire. "Okay? We have time before class." I nod. It was strange. Most people don't talk to me. At school I am always talked _about_, but never talked _to_. It felt…nostalgic, somehow. I think back to the days of hanging around after school with Miharu and Keiko, telling ghost stories and laughing together. I bite back a whimper. A wave of a hand in front of my eyes drags me out from my reverie. I snap my head up. The girl in front of me giggles and leads me out of the class. "You're an odd one. I'm sorry, but we haven't officially introduced. I'm Arikawa Kona. Call me Kona-chan, okay? And don't bother; I already know your name, Mai-chan!" I am silent, listening to the girl -Kona-chan- go on. "I'm not sure if you know me or not formally, but I'm the vice president here. I mean I'm sure you've heard my name, who hasn't? Haha, well anyway, it's nice to meet you, Mai-chan!" Kona sticks out her hand in front of me and I fix my eyes on it. She sweat drops and with her left hand grabs my uninjured one, pulling it into hers. I blink at her sudden contact and my eyes grow. "I know it's sudden 'cause we just met, but I think you and me should be friends! I see you hang around Kit-chan a lot, too. I hear she's twenty! Is that true?" Unable to form words, I nod. Her eyes sparkle and I imagine myself with those eyes. How I used to act so childish and my eyes always gleamed with curiosity and innocence. The thought stabs my chest. "That's cool. Well looks like we're here," she says, knocking lightly on the pale blue door. I look her over. Arikawa Kona… Her mouth never seemed to have been put down from her overly large grin and she looks at the world with such passion…I am tugged inside a room after faintly hearing a, "Come in!"

A woman in her late thirties sits at a desk, analyzing data from her paperwork. Her long, jet black, curly hair sits over her shoulder. Her lips plump and red and with skin as pale as the moon. Square framed glasses adorn her face along with a pair of beautiful brown eyes to go with. I am in awe. I had no clue our nurse was so beautiful…but then again, I haven't been here since my first year in high school. I swallow the lump in my throat at the word 'beautiful'. Kona pulls me inside, giddily announcing to 'not be shy'. I timidly take a seat in a small, black chair.

"Nora sensei! I have brought someone who needs a small wrap up job," The girl says, plopping herself down on the long, navy blue cushioned patient's bed. The woman known as Nora sensei sighs and turns around in her swirly chair.

"Kona-chan, how many times have I told you no sitting there?" Kona pouts and sticks her nose in the air. I sit back quietly and watch the two bicker. Nora sensei sighs and puts on a smile, "Nice to see you again Kona-chan. So, who's your friend? Haven't seen her around before."

Kona's smile, if possible, broadened at the question. "Her name's Mai-chan. Got a cut in her hand."

Nora sensei glances my way and takes off her glasses, revealing more of her beauty. An aching fills me on the inside, looking at the glasses. They remind me too much of-

"May I see?" Our eyes lock and after a second of silence I agree. She walks over and carefully takes hold of my hand, examining it. "Uh huh. Kona-chan, mind washing that up please? I'll go get the cream so it won't get infected and some gauze." Kona jumps up and claps her hands together, excited. She makes it seem as though it was the best treat in the world. "Of course sensei!"

I am pulled from my seat and over to the sink. The energetic girl cautiously rolls up my sleeve. I allow my eyes to roam back to hers. They were different. I could tell. The sudden spark of immatureness was gone and replaced with a more serious, intent look. She was stern about just washing my hand. Kona treated me with delicacy, testing the water for its temperature before running my hand underneath and careful rubbing away the blood. A medical student. That must be where she's aiming to be. My suspicions were found correct as she spoke.

"I've always wanted to be a doctor. Ever since I was a little girl. I love to help people. Just knowing I can save lives makes my heart feel so happy. I've been studying so hard so I could get into Tokyo University and get into their medical program. I hear it's amazing. I help Nora sensei out sometimes, too. For practice." I make no move to say anything back. I figure she realizes this and continues. "I think it would be great to be able to work with the body, as well. I'm infatuated," she whispers. Suddenly something shifts within the new look in her eyes and she shuts the water off before I could really tell what was different there. I glance over my shoulder to see the nurse smiling at us, ready to go. Nora sensei sees me looking and motions me over. I follow and she sits me down on the cushion Kona was on before. "Hold out your hand." I do as she says and observe her work. She has her glasses back on and pats my hand dry, then rubs a dime sized amount of a clear gel like substance on my palm. A relief washes into me. A new sensation that was oddly recognizable. Kind of like Aya- I freeze up and could feel a round of panic set in. Before anything happens though, I hear sensei calling my name.

"-ai? Mai?" I jump and she gives me a worried look. I force a small smile. "I'm fine," I whisper. She nods, "Right. Well, your all done here little miss. Back to class." She chuckles as Kona groans. "Thank you," I say, and stand to leave. As I am about to exit the room, Kona calls out, "Wait! Here, I'll walk you back. We _are_ in the same class, anyway." Are we? I hadn't noticed…

I agree and wait for my classmate to say goodbye and meet up with me at the door. That was quicker than I thought. But then again, the faster the better. It _was_ nice to have someone talking to me other than Kit, but for some reason, I'd much rather be isolated than talking to this girl.

Kona-chan giggles, "C'mon then, don't want to be late! I hear we have a new teacher coming in today. He's going to be teaching all of our classes after lunch. No one has seen him before though. It's so exciting!" I fight back the smile wanting to break out. I wonder if this was how contagious my laughter was back then.

We walked –me being pulled- along to the classroom. It was rather close to the nurse's office so it wasn't a far walk at all. Class 4-B. It was hard to believe it was my last year of high school. Just a couple years ago I was on my own completely and now I have Kit. Ever since I was…unemployed, I have been getting better grades in school. Though I'll admit I don't pay attention to a single sentence that comes out of my teachers' mouths. My grades were surprisingly high. I was an A student without trying. It just seemed like everything I looked at I knew the answer to. It didn't matter though. I was passing and so was Kit and it might be enough for a scholarship to college. If not, then we'll continue living how we are plus a job for me. I focused on what was going on around me. We had just entered the classroom and again I was receiving the stares.

"Why is Kona-chan with her?" "What's wrong with her hand? I know she's a cutter but…"

I tightened my fists for a second before releasing them to dangle at my sides. Kona grinned, "Ignore them." I didn't want to tell her that that had been what I've been doing since two years ago- ignoring other peoples thoughts about me, the looks and words thrown my way. I have experience with ignoring others. Something I am quite used to by now. Instead I let out a small, "Mm." She turns to me after reaching her desk, "Talk to you later, Mai!" I agree and walk quietly to my seat. Kona-chan goes on talking with her friends. I stay still and listen to them asking her why she was with a girl like me. She laughed at them and flicked her hand saying it was 'nonsense' and that 'she was a nice girl'. Part of me is warmed by her words, but the other part is wishing she'd just stop talking about me. She acts as though we are close when in reality we just met. I wonder why she even _is_ talking to a girl like me. It doesn't make sense. Student council vice president who is as cheery as pie seen talking –even walking back to class- with me; the gloomy cutter girl who's mentally unbalanced. Who in their right mind would do that? The thought strikes me that I would've been the person to do that as well. Back then, at least. Now it would be considered normal to talk to another person like me. But that's just it- there _is_ no one around here like me. I am my own category for a person, and in it, I am alone.

The sound of the door sliding open causes everyone to settle down. I fidget at my seat and put my hands on my lap, looking down. The girls among the room whisper and some squeal. Curiosity gets the better of me and I take the chance to glimpse up. A man, no less gorgeous than an American model, walks in. His bed head hair is medium length and a coal black color. His face is perfectly rounded and has a small tan to it. Eyes that gleam crystal blue like the ocean and a tall, lean figure that would make any girl swoon. He was young, maybe in his early twenties. Adorned in khaki slacks, a white button down inserted into his pants, black belt with matching dress shoes and a navy blue sweater buttoned up to his belly button he looked like a god. A binder is tucked under his arm and he takes the square framed glasses from out of his shirt pocket and onto his face.

"Better," he laughs.

The man walks at an unhurried pace to the podium at the front of the room. He sets down his binder and takes a moment to peek around. His ocean blue orbs remain on me for a moment and he smiles then turns back to the class. I shiver.

"Some of you might have heard that Tanaka sensei has fallen ill. Because of the fact, I shall be taking over the rest of your classes after lunch break. It is a pleasure to meet you all. My name is Koichi Okumara. Just call me Okumara sensei," Okumara-san flashed a smile. "I hope we all get along for the duration of my time here." Everyone in the classroom begins to clap, saying things like, "It's a pleasure to meet you, too!" or, "Welcome Okumara sensei." My lips part and a small breath of air leaves me. "I would love to get to know you all better so how about we do a little exercise so I can get to know your names. Sound alright?"

Kona-chan stands up and bows, "It is nice to meet you, Okumara sensei. I am Arikawa Kona the schools vice president. I think it is okay to say I speak for all of us when I state that that is a lovely idea." She turns to face the student as if asking for approval. A boy in the back agrees and calls out, "Why not?"

Okumara-san smiles wider, "Splendid. If you'd all sit now, thank you. We'll go down the rows and when it is your turn please stand, say your name and something personal about you. We'll start with myself then go on to the right side of the classroom first." Students take their seats now and watch carefully. I was in the last chair on the far left of the classroom, meaning I'd be last to go. I frowned. This activity was pointless. It would be much easier to get on with class and look at the roster sheet for names. Okumara-san clears his throat, "My name is Koichi Okumara and I believe in the paranormal." My pupils dilate and I could feel my heart leap. You know that feeling that settles in the pit of your stomach when you're really scared of something? The one that makes your legs feel like jelly and your mind starts to race. That's the feeling I had now at the word 'paranormal'. It seemed like it was forever that I was lost inside my head, inside my thoughts. I refused to freak out. Not now. Not in class. I collect myself and pay attention to the other things kids are saying. Next thing I know I'm hearing Kona-chan, three seats across from me, speak up, "My name is Arikawa Kona and I am actually a black belt in tae kwon do." Some mutter around the classroom. Apparently no one knew that. The teacher chuckles, "Impressive." I indistinctly listen as other kids go on and I'm so lost in thought I don't even here my name being called.

"ai? Taniyama Mai?" I flinch and barely lift my eyes to look at the person who said my name.

"It's your turn," Okumara-san says. I nod and stand. At first nothing comes out from me and I'm just staring down at my desk. After what might have been a minute or so, I still can't come up with anything to say. I decide to wing it. It's not like it's important, anyhow. "My name is…Taniyama Mai and I…every night I dream that I die." Utter shock plays out on everyone's faces and it becomes eerily quiet. Even I am taken aback at what I said. I lower my head so my bangs cover my eyes and sit, "Thank you."

The hush of the wind hitting the windows is the only sound that fills my ears. "Weirdo," someone says, breaking the silence. I recognize the voice and my muscles tense. Keiko. The girl I used to be best friends with has turned on me. Sure we stopped being friends after I came back to school from the ward, but never would I have ever thought she'd ridicule me. I suppose it was meant to happen anyway. It's true. I am a weirdo. Obviously spouting out the fact I dream of people's deaths to a class of high school students is a terrible decision in the first place. What's done is done. It's not like it affects my reputation. Ha, I _have_ no reputation. A sickeningly remorseful smile touched my lips. I'm dead to the world. I let my nails dig back into my wrists and kept my head down. It was going to be a long day.

**Rinny: So what do you think so far? And don't worry, eventually the SPR gang will come back!;D**

**Mai: Sure. It was alright. Not bad.**

**Rinny: I know right?(:**

**Mai: Don't be cocky.**

**Rinny: Sorry…**

**Mai: You made me a helpless little wimp. The hell.**

**Rinny: …**

**Mai: Review before I kick this girls ass.**


	2. Coughing

**Rinny: Chapter two!**

**Mai: Obviously!**

**Rinny: …Why are you so mean to me?**

**Mai: That's like asking a person in a wheel chair if they can walk yet.**

**Rinny: MEAN.**

**Mai: Damn straight. Disclaimer- dontplaywithlove does not own Ghost Hunt or anything in the content of these chapters.**

***With Time***

**Chapter Two- ****Coughing**

A pounding feeling continuously entered and exited my head. Like someone inside my brain swinging a large hammer around and letting each hit of it against something vibrate for a few seconds, then, when it finally dies down another set of hits come. I shakily pushed my hands against the surface of my desk and stood. What little amount of management over my vision I had left was gone. I stood still and waited for the tilting world around me to turn right side up again. Everything was swaying and spotted in black. Nausea swept over me and a cold sweat broke out over my forehead. A thick, grotesque substance was heading back up my throat. Disgusted, I swallowed it down and nearly gagged on its vulgar flavor. I felt a warm hand brush over my forehead, ridding me of a few sweat droplets. My body automatically tensed and my hands came to my chest forming an X. As my distorted vision became clearer, I noticed it was only Kit and lowered my arms. I panted lightly and squinted up at her through my hazy eyes. She was frowning down at me, worried, but well knowing that these feelings would pass me. I let my eyelids droop and listened to heavy breathing. My mind registered it as my own.

"Hold in there, sweetheart. We'll get you home soon."

I dimly distinguish the soft and caring tone as my best friend's. Sometimes this will happen to me at very random moments of the day. My body convulses like this at least once every forty eight hours, so I'm used to the sensations. It'll happen during class, at the grocery store, on the sidewalk- anywhere, really. I prefer when it happens in the comfort of home. My vision slowly and steadily returns and my breathing is even again. I stay in the same position, standing up and keeping my attention on the mahogany wood of my school desk. The students around me are oblivious to my pain and the darker side of me curses them for being so lucky as to not experience what I have to live through day in and day out. I close my eyes and find I cannot hear myself anymore, just the teenagers around me, giggling about so and so and the latest gossip, and the wind picking up, slapping lively tree branches against the windows. I reach my hand out for the navy blue bag hanging on the side of the small table and slowly it is in my hands, hanging over my shoulder. Out of the corner of my eye I see Kit staring at me vehemently, fervently. I tilt my head at her and rally up a menial smile. This causes her frown to deepen.

"I'm fine. It's normal, you know that. L-Let's go, okay?" I tell her. I mean for my voice to sound sturdy and soft, but it comes out raspy and low. Kit bites her lip and nods her head. She walks in front of me and, like lunch, I grip the back of her maroon sweater with two fingers and trail behind. I cough lightly in attempt to fix my vocals.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

I am mute to the class now. They are background sounds to the thumping of our feet that my ears pick up.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

The end of another long day… My body is willing to smile, thinking about it. Home. Yes, I'd much rather be home than here right now. No matter where I go, I never feel safe, but today being home with Kit and wrapped in the blanket of comfort she offers me sounds much better than staying the hell hole known as school. The environment, being surrounded by other people- it was overwhelming. _Too_ overwhelming for me to bear right now. My hand twitched involuntarily. As we neared the door exiting the classroom, I felt a tap on my shoulder. My body slumped forward.

_Thump. Thu-_

"Ah. Taniyama-san, was it?" Kit turned around and my fingers fell from their grasp. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion and she gave me a look, as if asking who the man behind me was. Another tiny cough escaped me and I turned as well, but remaining half behind the red haired girl, half exposed to my new teacher. I let my hand roam until it was locked on Kit's arm. She gave me an uneasy look. She wasn't sure whether to trust this man or not. I shook my head at her and looked back at Okumara sensei.

"Yes, Okumara sensei?" In understanding, Kit sighed.

The young teacher upheld a grin, "If it is alright, I'd like to discuss with you your…announcement from earlier." He paused slightly and annunciated the word 'announcement' before tilting his head. I was thrown a questioning glance from beside me but ignored it. I'd explain later.

"I'm sorry, sensei, but I'd rather refrain from that. Now if you'll excuse us, we must be getting home, "I spluttered, biting back my tongue. My mind got the better of me, jumping to conclusions over what he could possible want. Probably for me to see a counselor. I crinkled my nose. No counselor would help me. My eyes averted themselves from his gaze and moved to the ground. I tugged on Kit's shoulder, "Let's go?" She nodded. I turned to leave but was stopped again. "Taniyama-san, I'm sorry but 'no' was not an option. If not today than how about tomorrow? Brilliant. I'll catch you before class then. Have a lovely night, ladies." Kit scoffed and burrowed a suspicious look from behind her back towards him before grabbing my arm and kindly guiding me outside the classroom.

"What was his deal? " She muttered. I could sense her autumn orbs drifting my way, wanting an explanation of some sort.

"It was nothing," I immediately replied, choking on an inhale of air and then coughing. Her eyes changed from inquisitive to concern and she laid a hand over my back. "How about we go home and you can take a nap? When you wake up we'll make dinner and then do some homework together." I knew a nap was probably the last thing I needed. Instead of gaining stamina and resting, it only takes away my energy and exhausts me to sleep, but I didn't want to argue with Kit's good intents so I stayed quiet, only following her home.

We stopped at the front of the school to switch our shoes. Kit's shoe locker and mine were on opposite sides of the room. She gave me a little wave, "Be right back." I nodded my head and went to my own rusted, gray cubbyhole. I lifted my hand to open it and upon contact, felt a tingle run up my spine. Goosebumps formed on my pale skin but I shook it away and opened it to find a clean, white envelope lying atop my shoes. My eyes darted to each side of me before I reached in and hurriedly grabbed the small thing.

"Okay, coming Mai!" I heard Kit state. I bit my bottom lip and shoved the thing neatly into my sweater pocket then took out my shoes, switching them out. By the time Kit rounded the corner, I had my outside shoes on and was closing the rectangular door to the small compartment. She smiled at me and I returned a meek grin. "Ready?" I nodded. "Yeah."

Our apartment was on the outskirts of Shibuya, practically in its neighboring town. It took fifteen minutes to get to school if we took the short cut. That consisted of cutting through a few back yards, crawling under a couple fences and taking a bus. The long way was to walk the sidewalk all the way home and that took thirty minutes. Though it was quicker to take the short cut, it took a lot of strength to crawl or hop those fences and sometimes, if you were caught cutting through the yards, the owners of the houses would chase you away with broom sticks. All in all it was better for me to just walk all the way home. On some days I take the shorter way, but most of the time I end up drained of energy afterwards. I have a lot of strength built up in me but I don't like to exert my oomph for something like that.

Our apartment was small, but homey. Considering that it was located in an area where mostly the elderly lived, it was peaceful. The only noise you hear around there would be the sound of cats meowing, old women rocking in small wooden chairs outside their homes or me at night, occasionally waking up screaming. Everyone in the complex was familiar with my voice now. Kit and I occasionally helped out and took care of the plants outside or spruced up the buildings. I didn't mind it at all, and the landlady of the building was more than pleased about it. She is a very kind old woman. Deducts our rent by fifty dollars. She is one of the few people in life now that I consider a good soul. The only down side to where we live is the fact that many die in their homes. Normally it'll happen in their sleep, quick and painless to where they move on. On rare occasions an accident will happen such as someone living on an upper level in the building could fall over the railing or walking across the street and being hit by a car and once I heard there was a man in his sixties who died to gunshot from a robber. No suicides or anything, fortunately. I have seen many spirits wandering through the complex and I've successfully helped every one of them moved on. Not a single one was malevolent and for that I am grateful. It's difficult for me to deal with them. Even the kind ones scare me. In this world, _everything_ terrifies me.

The old oak trees that lined the sidewalk swayed with the whispering wind. Leaves fell to the ground and were kicked around by the cool, afternoon breeze. The sun, its sunset orange rays shining brilliantly down and reflecting off of every surface, was high in the sky, casting a glare off my eyes. The edge of my coal black, school shoes dribbled a pebble back to my home. I sighed lightly. Kit gave me a fleeting look before dropping her gaze.

"Listen, Mai," she started. "If anything is bothering you, you know I'm here, right?" She was hesitant. The woman thought over her words carefully, pausing slightly before nodding her head, affirming her proclamation. My left foot joined my right and I stood in place. Kit stumbled before realizing I stopped and turned around. Of course I know she's there for me. After all that we've been through together, how could I not? It was absurd, the way she thought I wouldn't tell her. But then again, it is wise to think like that around me. I don't like to burden others with my sorrows or problems. Never have and never will. It's just who I am. You can be as close to me as a flower's petals are to the bud, but in all actuality, I'll keep you in the dark about me. Half of what Kit knows about me was learned through being by me and experience. I don't like to talk about myself. It makes me feel like I'm holding others down. I'd rather shoulder the weight of my thoughts on my own, where I won't have to worry about other people being bothered or hurt because of it and I don't need to worry about being betrayed because of it; judged like some sort of beauty pageant girl or using it to hurt me or the people around me. No. I loathe the fact of hurting others whether it be intentional or not. I wouldn't risk our friendship, Kit and I's, by making her face my ugly fears and the dark things that creep into my mind. I just couldn't.

I smiled through what my head told me, "Of course, Kit. Thank you, but really, if there is something going on I will not falter to tell you." Just from the words coming out of my mouth, Kit was relieved. She sagged her shoulders happily, believing another lie I've strung together. It is not the first time I've had to tell a lie to protect others or keep them unaware.

I picture the day I was sitting in my room, pondering over the resume I had been handed. One simple page of harmless information. Harmless to the man wanting to hire me, at least. I had my doubts that he'd even spare a glance at this sheet once turned in, but decided it needed to be done. I had been thorough in making sure to complete every vacant spot with accuracy and fullness. Though there were two sections of the paper I had failed to come up with a proper response for. In dark, bold lettering read the words 'Parent/ Guardian(s) Signature' and a few spaces above that was 'Address'. Both columns struck me without reply. Hours I'd spent contemplating the questions, pen raised and poised, ready to write, but in the end I could not come up with anything to put. I settled in the end with forging my mother's signature and writing down the address to the small grocery store across the street from my complex. Guilt had eaten away at me for weeks on end. I kept waiting for someone to notice and pull me aside, but as predicted, my resume was not given second look. You'd have thought someone would at least look into where their employee lived. I was somewhat ashamed to let my new found family know I lived in one of the worst –yet cheapest- areas in all of Japan. I didn't want them to hate me because of it. Because of the fact I was living alone in such a rundown place. Sure, I was proud of the fact that I had made it this far on my own and was doing fairly well, but it still wasn't much of a thing to look happy about- living where I was, how I was. I looked out my window that night, tucked my head into my knees and let the silent tears streak my cheeks. For what reason, I didn't know. But it's what happened. The next day I recall being particularly chipper, earning myself a few looks from my workaholic boss and co-assistant.

Those were the times… I look up and narrow my eyes at the intensive beams of light coming from above. The sounds around me begin to morph. The chirping of swallow tailed birds, the chatter of nearby walkers, the buzz of the cars flying back on the street, children playing in a nearby park, the opening of doors to a café a few blocks down. Everything grows louder and the sounds speed up. A dull throb touches the inside of my head. I am engulfed in the noise and I feel my hand twitch before numbing slightly. Something surges into my hand and is stopped by a warm one, no bigger than my own, being placed on my shoulder.

"Mai. I said, are you okay?" I snap back to what's going on around me. The intensified sounds are back to their normal pace and volume.

"What?" I say. Because really, I am not too sure what just happened there.

"You zoned out for like ten minutes. Wouldn't move or speak, just looking up. Then your hand began spazzing out! I was really worried there," Kit said, pointing into the sky and letting out a breath of air. She put her palm to her forehead and closed her eyes. A few seconds later she opened them. Worry plaid out on all of her features, and she gave me a hug. I stood still, mute, arms at my sides and let her embrace me. "Don't scare me like that again, okay?" I just nod because again, I'm not sure what just went down.

***With Time***

I cross my arms over my chest and let my head gaze at the all too familiar scenery outside the window of our car. The man driving sighs and I cast him a glance. Lin has never been one to sigh. He seems to notice me staring and opens his mouth to speak. "It's been awhile Noll- two years, to be precise." I nod my head. I don't bother to say anything back and he knows this. It was pointless to add anything to such an obvious comment. Yet I can't help but feel like my friend was waiting for me to say something. It is true, being two years since our last time here. In Japan, In Shibuya, with our so called 'family' together. Or at least that's what Mai would refer to it as. That name sends tingles down into the pit of my stomach. I narrow my eyes at the air. Taniyama Mai. She was an interesting girl. Not put down easily, always a cheery soul, a very kind and compassionate person. She seemed to brighten whatever room she walked into and lighten the mood of every predicament, making even the most hard and depressed of people smile or show some sort of emotion. Taniyama Mai was a true mystery, yet, so open to everyone, so predictable. Never have I seen her put herself before another person. Her own well being might have well been dirt to that girl. Always so bright and energetic as well, trusting almost everyone within first encounter and talking to anyone she saw. Not to mention she made great tea. Yes, her tea was rather splendid. Though people like her more than commonly irritate me to no end, Taniyama Mai was an…exception. Not since the day I've met her have I been able to come up with a logical explanation to the feelings she gives me. No dictionary is of any help whatsoever and nor is any formula I know. Emotion. There were a few reasons why I never show it. One being the fact that they were the only thing I could not explain with facts or numbers or quantum theories. The dictionary meaning of the word emotion: an affective state of consciousness in which joy, sorrow, fear, hate, or the like, is experienced, as distinguished from cognitive and volitional states of consciousness. I certainly do not fear or hate her, which I know positively. Mai is not a person of high intimidation. Nor does she give people the vibe of discourteous, maddening and unappreciative. No, Mai is a person of the utmost thanks with manners so proper you'd question who the fine parents that raised her were, and is the most pleasant, likeable girl I've ever had the pleasure to come across. Not that I enjoy her company.

…It's not as though I do _not_ enjoy it either.

I furrowed my brow. This is the confusion that, I'll admit, drove me back to Japan; the person who drove me back here, Taniyama Mai. I informed my parents that the paranormal investigations in Japan were far more vast and captivating than that of the ones in England. Everyone believes that that is my sole purpose for coming back. Part of it is for that reason, but for the whole of it, it would be because of Mai. Don't get me wrong. As obnoxious a bunch of people as the rest of SPR was, I consider it…honorable to see them again. No one is aware of our coming back yet. All for Yasuhara Osamu. It appears he kept in contact with Madoka and found out. She tells me he will not let anyone else know; he was sworn to secrecy. I shake my head slightly. He was cunning every so often, I'll confess. A thought drifts through my mind and I begin wondering if he's talked to her about Mai…

Our jet black van slows before halting to a stop before a red light. I take this moment to speak, "Lin." The man lets out a grunt as a response. "Straight to the old office. We shall unpack first. Tomorrow I'll set off into town. During this time I would like for you to call Takigawa-san, Matsuzaki-san, Brown-san, Hara-san, Yasuhara-san and Mai. Tell them to be at the office around seven for dinner and I'll discuss with them a proposition; to come back. We're re-opening." Lin lets a small smile settle on his face. I give him a smug look, "Wipe that grin off your face. It doesn't quite suit you." His smile widens by a centimeter and changes into that of a smirk. I let out a wisp of air and let my fingers rub the bridge of my nose.

"I'm not even sure we still have the resume for Taniyama-san, Noll," Lin tells me.

I scoff. A rare gesture I show towards people. "I have logged the contact information of every SPR worker in my notepad." As if showing him it were true, I reach onto the dashboard of the van and grab for a fancy, black rectangular, composition book, flashing it towards the man before returning it to its place. He knows I am not lying. The logical side of me tells me that he had known I'd had it all along, just wanting the satisfaction of hearing me confirm it. And it was true; I had indeed kept information on the workers of SPR. As a proper employer, it was my job to do so. I have accounted for all phone numbers that can be reached, email addresses, home addresses, and even jotted down a few personal notes on each person. No one has set eyes on this book other than myself, and I plan to keep it that way.

In all honesty, it was a relief to be back. Not only for myself, but my assistant and past guardian, as well. Britain may have been my home, but I have grown rather fond of Japan. It's not like I'll let anyone know that. That would be another one of the many things I'll add to my growing list of secrets. I turn my head back towards the window and let my eyelids close. We still had another forty five minutes until we hit Shibuya. A small rest wouldn't hurt…

***With Time***

The sizzle of chopped pork against a burning pan filled my ears. Its fresh scent, accompanied by a mixture of seasonings and peppers, drifted through our abode. A small billow of smoke blew out from our tiny kitchen to the living room where I was sitting. Another aroma hit my nose and I familiarized it with the food I continuously consume. "Kit," I call out. My ears are greeted with the opening of a plastic package. "Yes?" She answers, shouting almost over the sound of a lively kitchen. "Can we heat up the melon bread tonight?" I've been craving something warm lately, and hot cocoa wasn't going to cut it tonight. She laughs and I peer over the coffee table in front of me to watch as she sets my dinner on a dark blue, round plate, and sticking it into the microwave, punching in a number and clicking start. The old, white machine brightens on the inside and my melon bread is turning in a circle, glistening in the heat of the light bulb inside. The feeling of starvation rolls around in my stomach but I stay where I am and continue to be patient. I am sitting cross legged on the stained carpet, in front of our mahogany wood coffee table, with my hands in my lap. A small pile of books and papers are stacked on the counter level with my chest. Kit decided to cook dinner tonight and let us do homework while we eat. Normally, we eat first, then complete homework, afterwards shower and later go to bed. It was weird, not bustling around the kitchen and trying to be useful to my friend. Other than what I already do, I'm pretty much a hopeless wreck. Or at least I feel like one. Kit always says I do more than enough. I don't believe her.

A new smell enters my sinuses and I recoil in disgust, holding the sleeves of my sweater over my nose. It smelt warm and fresh, like daises and mint. Just thinking about it makes me gag. I nuzzle my nose under the pink and gray striped pullover right beneath my chin, and crawl on all fours into a corner in the room. Once settled in, I put my back to the wall, curl my knees up into my chest, pull the back to my sweater over my head and lay my head inside my knees, cradling myself with my arms. The scent thickens and I don't dare lift my face to alarm Kit to get it away. Instead I hold myself tighter and suck in a breath, holding it with my cheeks puffed out. I can easily keep without breathing for thirty seconds. Then it becomes a struggle. I count by and wait for Kit to realize I dislike whatever it is she's brewing. A faint memory flickers in the back of my mind and I can almost reach out to it, but it's gone before I get the chance to figure out what this atrocious stench is. It is dim, yet so powerful to me and my senses. On the tip of my tongue I am beginning to recall what it is. It's so familiar to me. My thirty seconds are up now but I have no intention of letting go of my pure, clean, breath. Uncontaminated by this wretched stink. The smell to most others would be considered a delight. I could tell. But not to me. My head splotches and I am light headed. I needed air. Fortunately, just in time Kit notices my distress and I hear her hurriedly skipping to a window, letting it fly open and fanning out my dilemma.

See? This is why I am weak. This is why I am so frail.

I peer up a minute later, entranced by something I am more than thrilled to know is there. Kit holds out a plate to me. "It's hot, okay? Come eat at the table and we'll start the homework. Sorry, Mai-chan. I forgot that you…" She shakes her head and leads me back to the position I was in just minutes ago. "It'd be better if I don't let you remember that, right? Anyway, dig in!" I sit again and pull my sweater back down, adjusting it so it was comfortable. I wait for my friend to stumble back from the kitchen with her own plate of food. Stir fry pork and rice. She plops herself down beside me on the floor and grins. I can tell she's trying hard to make me happy so I pull my lips upwards and greet her with a small smile.

"Itadakimasu!" I nod and whisper back, "Itadakimasu."

Kit has her hair pulled up and into a messy bun on the left side of her head. She's sporting a pair of orange shorts and a white tank top along with a pair of ankle length, multi colored socks. The moment we got home I told her to go ahead and shower while I set the table, then she could come out and cook and I'd set our homework up. She agreed. Kit. Her full name was Natsume Kintan, but I had always liked it better calling her Kit. She didn't seem to mind, and it was a smaller thing for me to say, rather than Kintan. After awhile, the name kind of caught on. Now everyone calls her Kit. The crimson haired woman was beyond gorgeous. No freckles splotched her pale skin, she had a perfect figure with all the curves, white teeth, and everything about her was smooth and graceful. She had the laugh and smile of a refined woman. I was surprised she hadn't had a boyfriend. I'm sure she's been confessed to more times than you'd think possible. Kit made guys drool. That's just who she was. Occasionally, with all the people surrounding her, I felt overwhelmed and would have to leave, but for the most part she tries to stay closer to me, if anything. And besides, Kit wasn't the type of person who craved attention. She was more laid back and relaxed.

Comparing me to her always made me frown. I was not jealous of her, no. I hadn't been jealous of anyone in my entirely life. Other than…Hara… As I sunk my teeth into the steaming, soft bread, I twitched. Jealousy was not a nice thing. I deeply hated being envious of others. I let my eyes scoot over towards my best friend. She was pointing to a math problem, explaining to me how the Pythagorean Theorem could relate to solving the equation at hand. Truthfully, I wouldn't need to know _how _to do the problem, because as always, I'd glance at the test that'd be presented in class later this week and instantly know the answers. Math was never my strong subject, anyhow. The only classes I'd ever truly passed on my own throughout all of high school were Home EC, Art, Literature, English, Latin, Science, and Chorus. U.S History was an alright subject, seeing as how I was so used to looking into the past of places and filing.

The tapping of a pencil against my forehead made me jerk my shoulders forward. "Mai? Did you catch how to do this problem?" I blinked and leaned over the table slightly, glancing at a jumble of variables and numbers beside where a slender finger was pointing. It was a fairly complex equation, consisting of a few different mathematical theories I had learned in the past. I gazed down at it and a thought whispered in my head '62 pi'. "62 pi is the answer," I murmur, averting my eyes and nibbling on more of the warm, creamy bread. Kit sighed and lowered her hand to the beige chopsticks sitting at the edge of her plate. She swooped them up and positioned them in her hand, only to dive for a dark brown chunk of meat.

"Really Mai, I know you don't know how to solve that."  
>I kept my head away, chewing slowly on delicious melon. I mumbled, "But the answer was right…wasn't it?" Kit gobbled down another piece of fried pork and retorted, "Well yes, but that's not the point. If you don't understand how to do any of this, you're not learning Mai. And plus that's cheating." She pointed out, narrowing her eyes at me and using the tip of her chopsticks to knock on my nose. In one swift motion, I pulled my legs into my chest and rested my arms on my knees, gently setting my dinner down on a napkin discarded on our table.<p>

"I can't control it…you know. If I could I would."

And it was true. These thoughts in my head giving me answers were an uncontrollable force. They came when they felt like it and stayed away when they felt like it. For the most part they came out during homework, tests, quizzes, and just randomly at times, garbling nonsense into my head. Just random sentences or words, then it'd disappear and my mind would be left alone for awhile. If I could keep these thoughts in track, I would in a heartbeat. It didn't feel…right. And it only added to my crazy mental state.

Kit dropped her stare and silently chewed on a red pepper. "Sorry. I didn't mean…"

I shook my head and let it rest on my arms. "It's okay." She nodded and we ate the rest of dinner in silence, only sporadically speaking when talking about the homework assignment at hand.

The woman beside me stood up after wiping her mouth, collecting her plate and my napkin –which, might I add, had half a piece of melon bread sitting there untouched and cold. She frowned, "You really should be eating more." I ignored her comment, even though I knew she was right. I ate hardly anything now. And it wasn't because we didn't have the money. I didn't like eating. Only melon bread. But even then I still never felt like eating much. A few bites here and there and that was all I would digest. The most I've eaten in a day since two or three years ago is probably four and half whole pieces of the succulent treat. On rare instances I'd go with Kit to a bakery or café and possibly have a slice of cake. I was surprised I didn't have diabetes seeing as how the only food I ever ate was the sugary sweet snack. The detail that most foods I couldn't even stand to look at, let alone eat, was also a main factor in my issue. Too many things giving me bad reminders. Most of the time when I digested food it came right back up a few hours later.

Sometimes I wish I didn't have to eat to survive.

"I've got dishes tonight. Go shower, okay?" I peeked up at Kit hovering above me with a smile plastered to her face. I complied, standing up and sneaking off to the bathroom. Once inside I clicked the door shut, leaned against the wall, and put my hands behind my back. A tingly sensation scurried up my throat and I slowly threw my hand over my mouth, coughing. When the feeling subsided my hand slumped at my side. Wearily, my irises trailed to the mirror across from me. I glimpse at my complexion. My hair is the same short, wood brown color as before, freely hanging down and framing my face. Skinny…I looked a bit anorexic. My bones could easily be seen when I wore a tank top or light material clothing. I was a light tan from spending so much time under hospital lights and getting outside –courtesy of the hospital, saying I 'needed fresh air every once in awhile', but for the most part rather pale. My eyes, large and that curious, innocent, cinnamon color added to it. Though I wouldn't necessarily call myself 'innocent'… I've been through too much to be just 'innocent'. I was adorned in a pink and grey striped sweater and a pair of old, jean shorts with tears and holes in various places. Another set of tingles found their way up my esophagus and I began coughing crazily again. I leaned forward over the sink as I hack away on air. My throat was raw and had a ragged feeling towards it. The next cough that came from my mouth had me choking out a small spit wad of blood. My eyes widened and I covered my mouth, still spluttering into my hand. By the time I shakily pulled my palm away, it was stained with a crimson liquid color. I hurriedly turned on the faucet and began splashing water onto my face and scrubbing at my hands. I was sopping wet and had soaked my shirt through as well. My hand clasped at the nozzle and I turned off the fountain of water. Taking a good look in the mirror, I was disgusted with myself. What am I?

The churning of my insides alerted me dinner might be coming back up soon. I knew something was wrong then. I haven't coughed _blood_ since I was in the ward. I fought with my clothes, attempting to detach them from my clammy body. In a few moments I had done nothing but discard my shirt, shorts and underwear. My bra was tangled up in my arms and I started panicking, struggling to get it off. My breath hitched as I finally broke free of the clothing. Instinctively, my arms wrapped around my body and I sunk to the floor against the bathtub.

**Rinny: Sorry the chapter update was a bit late… Hope you liked it! Though I do believe I rushed it a little aha. Feedback?**

**Mai: Eh…It was rushed.**

**Rinny: … -.-**

**Mai: Trying to be honest. Anyway review please and the next chapter will come MUCH faster.**

**Rinny: *mimics sarcastically* The next chapter will come MUCH faster. **

**Mai: …**

**Rinny: ANYWAY. Here's a preview of part of the next chapter. **

_I sighed and glanced at the phone. Taniyama Mai. She was next on the list of people Noll demanded I call. I sifted through a few papers laying on my desk before stopping at a familiar looking resume. Old and crinkled, I pulled out the resume. A picture of the fifteen year old girl was framed in the upper left hand corner. My eyes drifted down until they reached the home phone contact number. I picked up the receiver and began dialing the seven digits._

_Five rings resonated through my ears. After the fifth, a voicemail came on. _

"_Hey it's Kit!" _Silence ensued after the firstline and I began to wonder if Taniyama-san changed her phone number. _"C'mon Mai, we've rehearsed this. Say your name." _The same voice as before giggled, urging the other girl to speak. _"Who am I again?" _My eyes slightly widened. That was… _"Mai," _The girl sighed, _"Your name is Taniyama Mai." "Oh…yeah," _the other girl spoke quietly. I sat on the edge of my seat now, holding the phone close to my ears. She still sounded as young as before. This must've been an older voicemail…_"And I'm Mai," _Taniyama-san added softly, her voice barely above a whisper, yet more confident now. _"We can't get to the phone right now so please leave your name, number, and a message and we'll get back to you as soon as possible!" _That was the first girl. The line, however, did not go dead afterwards. It lingered on for a few more moments and I just barley caught the, _"Mai, don't touch the knives!" _Before the phone cut to static. The operator came on and began murmuring the usual but I dropped the phone.

**Rinny: Well that's it! Please review!**


	3. Don't Look For Me

**Rinny: Hello(: Chapter three. Though a tad bit late. I've been working my butt off on a creative writing essay. Had to cram thirteen pages all in two hours. Lesson one kiddies; don't wait last minute to type an essay. Aha:P**

**Mai: That's sad. I have no sympathy for you.**

**Rinny: Wasn't asking for it. Anyway, R&R please and I really hope you like the chapter!**

**Mai: Disclaimer- dontplaywithlove does not own Ghost Hunt or anything in the content of these chapters. **

**Rinny: And just before the chapter starts, I'll tell you what sofies are, for those of you who don't know. (Will be used in the first paragraph of this chapter.) Sofies are basically a pair of shorts, most cheer leaders wear them to practice, with a 'V' cut on both sides at the bottom. They are like house shorts, not jean, and are made out of a soft fabric, like normally pajama shorts.**

***With Time***

**Chapter Three-**** Don't Look For Me**

I shook my head, water sloshing out from my slick, coffee brown hair, and sending bits of it flying around me. With a wobbly hand, I reached for a light green brush sitting on the counter, unknotting the tangles in my hair and straightening it out. I winced when coming in contact with a particularly strong knot, but grabbed the lock of hair and continued to brush it out. When I finished, I walked over to the dresser Kit and I share. Kneeling down, I sorted through and found a pair of black sofies, a white t-shirt, and black socks. I lay them out on my bed and stood back up, letting my towel slip off and drop to the floor. I slide on my clothes and walk unsteadily back into the bathroom to hang up my damp, white towel. On my way back to the bedroom, I peek into the living room to see Kit curled up on the sofa, fast asleep. Upon returning to our simple room, I picked up the large, daisy yellow comforter, and continued back to the living room, neatly arranging it over the soundly sleeping girl's body. She squirmed and her eyebrows knitted together upon contact, but instantly relaxed and she turned back to a peaceful sleep. Kit and I shared a bedroom and a bed. Practically, we shared everything. But I didn't mind. In fact, I preferred it.

I flipped the switch on the wall and immediately was engulfed in darkness. A shiver crawled up my spine but I ignored it and made my way into the kitchen. Feeling my way through, I got to the refrigerator and gently pried it open, trying hard to be silent.

That wasn't an issue for me.

I scanned the products inside before encountering a half filled water bottle. I stuck my hand within and took it out, gripping the worn handle on the door and closing it, shuffling back to my room. With no comforter, I was left with pale yellow thin sheets. Light blue hemming was embroidered around the covers and beside them were two messily thrown together pillows. Their cases were the same light blue as the hemming on our sheets and had sunflower yellow stripes drawn slanted across the face.

I crawled into the bed and leaned up against the dark russet head board. I pulled the blanket up over me and tucked my knees up into my chest. Both pillows were neatly placed behind my back. I twisted the cap off of the water bottle and guzzled down a fourth of it before choking slightly and having to stop. I screwed the lid back on and set the bottle on the floor. Instead of staying upright, it toppled over because of my unsteady hand. I ignored it and wrapped my arms around my knees, looking straight ahead. My eyes pierced the peeling white paint of my walls. Beat up, brown wood was barely showing off underneath what looked to be about two coats of paint. Hanging over it was a few posters of bands that Kit liked, a few of my drawings, and a not-so-copious amount of pictures. Only the important ones. One was of Kit and I sleeping next to each other in the ward.

I remember that night.

The doctors continuously told me not to sleep with her but I couldn't help it. Only Kit knew of my nightmares each night, and the terror each one held. The pain, so real and intense, the images, so clear and stabbing, the feelings, so rich and _there_. She was always right beside me, Kit, only a few feet away in a bed made up of plain white sheets, much like mine and everyone else's, watching me closely as I struggled and whimpered, cried as fresh scars and bruises materialized over my pale body, as I suffered. She knew. And then it happened. An unspoken agreement between her and I. From that one night on, I crawled into bed with Kit. No words traded, just our eyes which told our stories for us. Numerous times those god awful people tried to pry me away from her and then they realized. When my dreaming became more frightful and my petrified screaming dragged out through the entire building, seeking a source of comfort and help. When I slept with Kit, it wasn't so awful. She held me in her arms and cradled not only my head, but my entire self. Stroking my cheek with intricate patterns using only her bare, silken fingers. Knotting her hands through the tangles of my hair. Planting gentle kisses along my forehead as if somehow knowing that pressing any harder would result in my frail body cracking, and crumbling down to ash. A nurse arrived one morning to bring us breakfast and hook me back up to my drug supply- a sleep serum they had put into an IV bag for me. She took a picture of us and got it developed, handing a copy to us both thinking we may want it. I'm glad she did. In the photo, Kit was half sitting against the propped up pillows on her bedspread, head tilted to the right fast asleep. Her right arm was draped over my stomach in a protective way, the other covering the back of my head. I was lying on my side to Kit's right, arms balled into my chest and leaning into Kit, legs curled up next to my friend's. My messy brown locks were strewn all over my face, which was flushed red and had tear tracks running down it.

My arm instinctively reached out to touch the picture, twisting to the right and slowly, slowly, grasping the air. Just like that it dropped down on the bed. A lump caught in my throat and I swallowed it, coughing lightly once more.

The second photo a little farther down was of Kit's mum and dad and her. She was around seven in the picture, smiling with a big, toothy grin, her fingers latched around her parents larger hands. Even then, the crimson color of her hair and eyes popped out like a wildfire. Her mother was beautiful with blonde chunks of wavy hair and deep brown eyes, her father a gingery hair color with hazel-orange irises. Beside her photo was mine. My mom, dad, and I. I was five, beaming into the camera with a matching peace sign to my father's, in a pink blouse and pale daisy colored skirt, new white socks hiked up to my knees. His left hand plopped onto my straightened, coffee locks. My mother was in a bright yellow dress, a white turtle neck underneath, laughing heartily at my father and I. And my father, a slight stubble forming around his face with khaki slacks and a snow white, button up, dress shirt. His tie, matching my mother's dress, was loose and crooked.

The last picture. It was hiding behind a thick, coal black, sheet of construction paper. My memory was hazy on it. A small buzz tingled inside my head and I clutched it. It was uncomfortable. A familiar sensation, yet totally new at the same time. What was behind that paper? As if thinking that triggered something in my mind, the buzz became a throb, so lively it echoed in my ears. My teeth instantly smacked together, gritting in annoyance. No, not annoyance…confusion? I straightened my back and pushed myself forward, hands in front of me as I creep along the mattress until I got to the very end. In a crouching position, I was wobbly. My knees buckled together from lack of concentration- all of it transferring to that stupid tingle. What was so familiar about this? I don't think I ever remember noticing it before… When did I even put this up? Why was it covered?

Questions swarmed my head. The only thing I needed now was answers. My eyebrows knit together in frustration. Another glance at that piece of paper, so dark and alluring, had me in a cold sweat. It was unbearable, staring at this insubstantial sheet that hid something so _secretive_.

Part of me snapped.

Not the way in which your insides begin to boil, your face flushes and you begin trembling, but when your hands get chilly and clammy and you twitch in anticipation. I was not excited to see this photo, but anxious. A side of me not so much, wanting to hide behind my flimsy covers now before something went wrong. And a side of me had a feeling that something _was_ going to go wrong. But I didn't care. Not at the moment. A knot coiled in the pit of my stomach but I pressed on. For something so simple to bring me near hysterics, this must've been important- to an extent. I switched to a sitting position and swung my legs over the edge of the bed. Standing on my feet now, I gripped the fabric of clothing over my heart with one hand and with the other, prepared to unveil the picture. With shaky fingers, I snatched the sheet of construction paper hanging loosely by a single piece of duct tape, and both the paper and the photo fluttered to the floor near my toes. Little by little, cautiously, my eyes trailed downwards.

My free hand flew to my mouth. As I went to take a step back, my foot tripped over the coal colored paper and I was sent tumbling back onto the bed. I screwed my eyelids shut and tried to calm my beating heart, pounding wildly against my rib cage.

In my mind's eye, the faces of many resurfaced. A college student with glasses, with a smile that seemed so innocent, yet held such devilish thoughts. A young man with dirty blonde hair and an angelic look, his ocean blue eyes dancing like the waves they formed. A woman, short and petite, sporting an elegant kimono and a blob of silky black hair. Another woman, who had eyes that gleamed like a raging fire, holding a purse up ready to whack a person dead at any moment. A man with a grin so playful, so teasing, so full of laughter, and the fatherly aura surrounding him. Dark hair falling over one eye was a man who always seemed mute, but in reality, was full of color on the inside. A beautiful woman full of bright eyes and stories, daffodil pink locks and soft brown irises. And lastly a man, tall and carrying an overflow of secrets, no smiles exchanged, no truth behind his eyes. A man so fake, yet so real. And suddenly I am seeing his lips curl upwards, forming that rare gesture he hardly ever shows. Except once. Yes once, I remember it as clear as day. At that one school during a case, it was evening time and the sun was setting just right, mellow hues shooting out in every which way, we were bickering as always and then it happened. As true and genuine as the words of a priest. His name sends a burst of odd sensations up my spine and over my mouth. The bright pink muscle resting near my teeth flickers.

"Naru," I whisper.

A searing pain shoots through me, past me, with me. From head to toe, a jolt resides insides me. Like electricity, buzzing in my veins, sending unnatural feelings everywhere. But it hurts the most in my head. Where my memories are stored and made, recreated and fixed. My back quickly arches forward, my hands smashing my head in between them, legs pushed into my chest painfully; squishing my boney chest to the point where I feel it'll almost burst. A blood curdling scream catches in my throat and I end up squeaking excruciatingly, the sound barely passing my lips, parted in ache. All of the innards in me are contracting, tangling together and coiling around every organ, becoming smaller or bigger I can't tell. I look around with half lidded eyes, holding in the terrible sensations.

"A-ah," I gasp out, my voice reduced to a high pitched breath of air.

Itching. It settles uncomfortably in my throat, passing my screams until it's got me coughing profusely. The pungent taste of iron fills my mouth, making my taste buds withdraw in disgust. Bile joins the deep, red substance residing there. I am choking now, on what little was left of my dinner, the substance which I've now come to realize is blood, and my pent up screams. I roll over on the bed and plunge deep into the mattress, distributing bits of blood and vomit on every surface. In a failed attempt to stop these untamed feelings, I clutch the sheets, stained crimson and this god awful pea green. My white shirt has changed color. Even my face, pale and clear, is now unrecognizable. Whether it be from me scrunching my features in agony or the writhing against my soiled bed, it wouldn't matter. The thumping in my head has increased tenfold and is now a wild drum being beaten down with bricks. Air is barley passing through my lungs. My limbs twitch in spasms, jerking at random intervals. I suck in rapidly through my crimson colored lips, trying to take in as much oxygen as possible.

I wish someone would come knock me out, put me out of my misery. A million images flutter through my mind, frame by frame, scene by scene. In sync, my long, light brown eyelashes continue to batter. A thought crosses by along with these pictures and for a second, I think I'm being sent into a _dream_.

_My body rocketed upwards into a sitting position. I blinked once before letting my eyes wander. Surrounded by walls of shadows, the only other color being the white reflection of my body against what is supposedly the floor. As I moved to get up, I tipped over. My body felt…different. The pains I had once bear had vanished without a trace, my entire being feeling renewed and back to its old self. Back to how it felt only a few finger count years ago. The left of my lip went slack, shocked. I wasn't sure whether to be happy or… The tapping of feet made me snap my head up. Once again I tried to stand, wobbly at first but soon becoming statue still. _

"_Hello?" I asked, somewhat excited to hear my voice. Normal. The same soft and strong pitch I had once called mine. A nostalgic feeling swept through me and I couldn't help but smile, even in this unknown predicament. The footsteps grew closer and became a loud patter to my ears, perfectly keen. Soon enough I realized the clattering sounds were coming from behind me and I turned for a big surprise. My cinnamon irises amplified, registering the figure. My breath left me and I jumped. Not at all the reaction this person was hoping for, for he frowned in discontent. A cycle of fear washed over me and I froze, taking precautionary steps back. I went rigid, clamping my eyes and fisting my hands at my sides. _

_But of course, I tripped._

_I gave a startled yelp and winced, snapping my eyes open again to rub my sore bottom. In terror, I scooted backwards, ignoring the snippets of agitation my rump was screaming at me. I stumbled to stand again and back away more. With each step _he _took forward, I took back. I had my body back, my voice even, but why was this fright still present? Residing inside me like a puppy caged up, being held there. But a voice inside was telling me that I wasn't acting like this willingly. Bad, twisted memories. _

"_Reconstructed," A soft, feminine voice added. It seemed to belong to a girl around the age of thirteen. I impulsively turned my head quicker than a whip to find her. A moment later, I turned back to find the boy before me gone. My heart rate quickened. Where did he go? _

"_He is sad," the same voice as before replied. It seemed like it was reading my thoughts. Just the thought of that startled me even worse. My lips parted, ready to speak, but words hung empty over my mouth. Heavy, warm breathing instead fell out. I twirled around to see this girl, her words dull, yet drawing out much emotion. _

_I started, "Who are-"_

"…_You?" She finished. I figured the question was rhetorical and kept my lips sealed._

_After a moment of parted silence, a sudden burst of air caught my attention. Right before my eyes appeared this young woman. And this young woman was surrounded in a light so warm and hopeful. Yet this light was not yellow, but a wave of angelic white. She was dressed in a sky blue dress that hung loosely around her thighs, strapless and securing her chest tightly. The bottom of the magnificent garb had little silver squiggles running up it, circling in elaborate patterns up to her chest, where the swirls turned into a horizontal line around her breasts. On her feet, which gave the impression of floating weightlessly, were flats, the same sky blue as her dress, with hemming the color of clouds and a tiny silver bell on the tip of each foot. Her beautiful dark brown hair ran down the parting on her head to the top of the fabric covering her breasts, curling in small waves. This girl had silky white skin clutching her bones, and electric blue eyes that mesmerized even I. _

_I could do nothing but stare. She was the embodiment of stunning. A calm, serene quiet lingered in the air. It all felt so thick, it was almost as if I could touch it. _

"_In life, I am called Miharu," she announced. The lightness in her tone was relaxing. I sagged my shoulders. But wait- in life?_

"_Are you…dead?" I asked. All panic fled as soon as it came, and was replaced with curiosity. Who was this girl?_

_Miharu smiled slightly, tilting her head. The gesture made her look younger, like a child, like her age. _

"_I am very much alive. Both in the world you and I roam and…in spirit. I may look young- in fact, I am only fourteen, but my wisdom is far greater than most man. And so is yours. You know me not now, Mai, but soon we will meet. And when we do, you'd best be prepared to face your past, the present, and the future. Life has a few twists and turns for you, and death has a couple of tricks up its sleeves. Be ready for it, for me, for us, Mai Taniyama. Time is short, and it is looking for you. Soon."_

My eyes fluttered open, ears ringing relentlessly. But not from my internal system. A deep, high pitched beeping noise prolonged at two second intervals. My eyelids squinted and I turned my head. Our alarm clock flashed a bright red number- 6:45. School was the first topic to slam into my head. Kit and I had to leave in twenty minutes. Then realization dawned.

_Twenty minutes!_

I made to move out of the bed and ache rammed into my entire body. I groaned in agony but still got up. I was slow- very, _very _slow. I heard Kit shuffling about in the kitchen, probably preparing breakfast. The second thing I noticed, however, was pertaining to my surroundings. I was still huddled in our bedroom, but the scent of freshly washed sheets reached my nose, and the attire I had on was completely different from my t-shirt and sophies. Instead I was dressed in a navy blue shirt and long black sweatpants. My memory was unclear on last night. I remember getting out of the shower, changing, putting a blanket on Kit, and the rest is muddled.

"Kit?" I asked. I was alarmed when my pitch was raspy and higher than usual, squeaking kind of. As though I'd been screaming.

The shuffling got louder and soon the redhead was in the room with me.

"Mai? Oh you're awake! You've been out for what- two or three days now?" She ranted, smiling sadly and coming to give me a gentle squeeze. Two or three days? I felt like I've been asleep for two or three hours. As usual, I'm betting dark bags hung under my eyes, so I was also rather surprised when Kit next spoke, "You look really well rested, though. You haven't been sleeping enough, anyway. I was worried, but the sleep was needed. When I found you though I was-"

I glanced at her, confused. Unexpectedly, Kit stopped speaking and looked away in shame. No, not shame, sorrow.

"Kit?" I croaked. She stayed quiet and leisurely backed towards the door.

"You should probably stay home another day, you don't sound too good. And I'm still worried about you. Okay? So please…"

The last thing I had on my mind at the moment was to upset Kit, so I just nodded.

"Okay," I agreed, and scooted my way back into the bed. She coughed and for a second I saw a flash of tears sweep by her eyes, but she brushed them away before I could label it as anything. Kit was already dressed in her uniform- a beige skirt that ended four inches above the knee, a white button up, peach colored sweatshirt with a matching bow around the neck, knee high white socks, and tan colored shoes. The silly uniform code our school has comes to mind. Girls received two colored uniforms, one beige, white, and maroon, the other, beige, white, and peach. You were to switch off with your uniforms every other day. For guys, it was the same, except they received neckties and long pants. A small smile fell over me.

"-ai? Listen, I have to go now, okay? I really wish I could stay with you… But my days of absence this year have nearly reached their max. Don't forget to eat –I have some melon bread stored in the fridge for you- and make sure you stay inside. Try and take a few naps, alright? If you need me, call my cell. I'll ask Nana-san next door to stay alert, so if it's an emergency just go to her. Will you be okay?" I can tell this is a big thing for Kit. We've never really separated before for a whole day. And I've never had to stay home sick on my own. I bob my head and give her a reassuring smile. She frowns and sits next to me on the bed. She plops down and automatically lays her hand over mine. I sit up carefully and hold her hand as strong as I can. This seems to calm her.

"I'll run straight home after the last bell. Be careful and…stay away from anything dangerous. I'm really sorry that I- I'm sorry, Mai-chan," she whispers, leaning her forehead against mine. Her breath is cool against my nose. Honestly, I didn't even really plan on leaving this bed all day.

"I promise I- I'll be- be good." I choke out. She swallows what I'm sure is a sob and my hold on her tightens.

"I love you," she murmurs.

"I love- love you, too," I get out. And it was true. I loved Kit like my mother, or my sister. Even though I have always been an only child, Kit fills in that blank along with a motherly role.

***With Time***

My back against the hard backboard of the bed, I stare uninterestedly at my hands. For the umpteenth time I sigh and end up coughing as well, moving my palms to my mouth to cover the germs sure to spread. A light, red liquid splatters on them but I settle with wiping it on a stray tissue. The substance wasn't too thick this time, and I've been coughing blood up for the past two hours. My mouth is filled with nothing but the taste of iron. I grimace and reflexively gag, shivering. I glance around the room for something to do and suddenly a thought pops into mind. I spot my uniform slumping against the closet and crawl out of the restricting sheets to grab it. It's a hassle at first, but I make it there and search through my sweater pocket until my fingers graze a thin, white envelope. My labored breathing seems to jump. With shaky steps, I tip toe back to the bed and slide in.

My fingers roam the card, small, yet heavy. About the weight of a handful of crayons. A lump settles in my throat as I move to open it.

_Taniyama Mai,_

_I've been watching, oh I have been watching. Watching you like you would a new baby bird. I see your pain and I notice your fears, so close and dear and scariest here- where your memories are held and time takes place, a land not of crisped, tiny snowflakes. But a place for evil and dread will lurk, haunting your past, present, and- Your future once bright now wallows in misery, but meet an angel to save its' history. My name means watchful and that's what I'll do, stand by your side and look out for you. But not only I can complete my job, but you, Taniyama Mai, must start anew. Find me I am waiting, healing others wounds, so close, so close, yet much farther to be found. Disguised I am but you will recognize, a girl like you on the inside. Time is short and it is looking for you. Be prepared to face life, death, and you'll learn everything has something to do- to do, everything has to do with you. _

_-Find Me_

All time ceased to exist at the moment. I stared cautiously at the sheet of fine paper, running my hand over the printed words, so neatly arranged in a poem. But this poem had no stanzas…

The fact that this letter wasn't quite correct with its line placement was noted as nothing for now. Instead, I began questioning what exactly it meant. I knew I had plenty of time before Kit came home so I turned towards the bedside table. My hand gripped the drawer and pulled it open- with difficulty, I should add. In a few seconds I had three sheets of lined paper and a pencil in my hand, my algebra textbook laying on my lap to act as a desk for my notes. Quizzically, my eyebrows knitted together. Okay how about we start with line one… I've got to start somewhere, right? Another tickle landed in my throat and I balled my fist, bringing it to my moist lips as I bark out.

***With Time***

I grunted, carrying the last box into the bureau. I walked carefully towards my office, kicking the door open with the tip of my shoe and placing the heavy cube on the table with a 'thud'. A sigh left me and I walked back out to find Lin unpacking books and shelves, placing them around the room after giving the marked area a good dust. Upon hearing me come in, he turns and stares, another four books cradled in his arms.

"If you'd like, I'll stay to fix up here. Though I do still have to give a call to everyone," he mentioned.

I looked away and crossed my arms. It'd be easier for me if he finished this task, while I go out to run my errands… I rubbed the bridge of my nose in annoyance and held in a sneeze. The amount of dust piled in here was absurd.

"No. I'll stay to help. Get your office and the main area here done; I'll set up the remnants of the kitchen and my own office. Do not forget to set up Mai's desk," I added as an afterthought. The man nodded and went to stack up the books in his arms. I could feel a small grin waver on his lips and my lip twitched.

"And," I began, "Call up everyone first. Connect the telephone line in your office to have it done."

With that, I turned and marched into the kitchen to begin opening more boxes. I made a mental note to borrow a duster from Lin.

I watched as Naru stalked into the kitchen. He's grown a lot since I last recall. Not only appearance wise, but maturity wise and personality wise. Though he'd always been very mature for his age group, I could still see parts of him that were kid like. Even if no one else noticed these traits of his- except one girl, who I know saw him for whom he really is. I smiled lightly and went on placing the rest of the books in their proper place. As I finished up, I stood from my crouching position and dusted my hands, unrolling my sleeves. I crinkled my nose and walked over to my office door, opening it and heading to my desk. Several other blonde cardboard boxes lined its surface. I scanned the labels until I caught one that said 'Electronics', and cracked it open. Ripping off the tape, I balled it up and set it to the side, sifting through the inside. My work monitor, key board, and mouse were neatly arranged on top. Below that were a digital clock and the phone. I took every item out of the box while going through it, correctly putting them in their spots but not plugging them up.

The hard, black plastic of the telephone was laid down on the desk. I unraveled the cord and hooked it up in the phone socket on the left side of the wall. Immediately the device's face began glowing black numbers over a green background.

I tsked, having to rummage around in another box, emptying its contents in large heaps of paper over what little remaining space on my desk I had. These were my important documents. One whole section belonged to the members of SPR. Or more like, pertaining to them. The first fifteen or so pages on the top were on John Brown, the Catholic exorcist priest who appeared quite young, but in all actuality would be twenty three or twenty four this year. Naru wasn't the only one who kept notes on our workers. Except my own wasn't in some fancy black notepad. My hands roamed his pages, searching for contact information. Ah. I picked up the receiver on the phone and began punching in seven digits, putting the sculpted item up to my ear.

_Ring. Ring. Ri-_

"'Ello, John Brown here."

I coughed once before speaking in a deep tone, "John? It's Lin Koujo. If you'd like, Naru has requested for you to meet at the old SPR office around seven tonight if possible. He has a proposition to discuss with you all. I understand this is last minute and if you are unavailable…"

Silence ensued for a few moments as he registered these details. In a rushed voice he added, "Oh! I assume you're both…back, then? Well, I'll be! You can expect me there. Thank you."

The click of the phone alerted me the call was over. I sighed and lay the phone on my lap. I glanced at the large amount of papers and started sorting through, pulling out each page that recorded the contact information of our old friends and colleges. Once I had them all pulled out, I began dialing once more.

"Hello?" A groggy voice asked.

I couldn't help but chuckle, something I've strangely been doing more often, "Matsuzaki-san?"

The response was immediate. "Lin?" In the background I could hear shuffling around and a male voice. The phone shifted and someone else began talking. "Lin? You're on speaker… It's Takigawa."

Shock was evident on my face and even in my voice when I said, "Takigawa-san?"

Matsuzaki-san groaned in frustration and yelled out, "Oh great, now he believes we're together, you doof! This idiot dragged me out of bed banging on my door, asking to go over the last case we took on. But this- this is a sudden surprise."

Sudden case? "Yes." I paused. "Naru has requested-"

"NARU?" They both yelped in unison. I pulled the phone away from my ear, aghast. Were they always this lively?

"Yes, Naru. He has requested for you both to come down to the old office at seven tonight. If possible, of course. I understand this is-"

Ayako interrupted, snorting, "You can count me in."

The monk and bassist laughed, "Me, too.

The two suddenly started bickering and I pulled the phone away once more, hanging up. It was much too early to begin _this_. Well, next would be Hara-san. I pushed the keys on the number pad and awaited the ringing.

"Ah- Hello?" A sleepy voice yawned. Mellow. That would most definitely be Hara-san.

I could always remember her fawning desperately over Naru. Not so much desperately as it would be possessively. She really liked him. Genuinely, as well. At least, partly that was true. But she was a kind girl, mistreated and misunderstood by her intentions, yes, but a good girl. Albeit irking, at times.

"Hara-san. It's Lin Koujo," I started. I didn't believe it to be a swell idea saying Naru requested her, so I worded my invitation differently. "Around seven tonight could you please come down to the old SPR office? We have a proposition for you.

She did not waver when replying, "Will…Naru be there?"

"Yes."

"I will cancel my plans for tonight, then. Give him my thanks. And you, as well Lin. Goodbye."

I leaned back against my chair, massaging my temples. She was easy, perhaps, but still a bit of a pain in my rear. I sat back up, prepared to call Yasuhara-san.

"Hello, Lin?"

I blinked. "Yasu…hara…san. How were you aware of this being me?"

He chuckled, answering teasingly, "Caller ID, of course. Your number is still the same and I recognized the ID, is all. And quite the unexpected awakening. Back so soon?"

I crossed my arms over my chest, surprised at such a remark. "Yes. Although two years seems lengthy."

"Quite so. I suppose there is a reason to this out-of-the-blue call?"

I had to give him credit. Yasuhara Osamu was a smart man. Especially so young, back on our cases. "Of course. Naru and I have requested you come by the office around seven tonight, if possible. I can guarantee your coming will not be wasted."

"Wouldn't have doubted that, Lin. I did have a study session tonight, but a reunion with the gang? If my assumption that everyone else is being called was right, that is. I accept. Thanks honey~" And the line went dead.

I sighed and glanced at the phone. Taniyama Mai. She was next on the list of people Noll demanded I call. I sifted through a few papers laying on my desk before stopping at a familiar looking resume. Old and crinkled, I pulled out the resume. A picture of the fifteen year old girl was framed in the upper left hand corner. My eyes drifted down until they reached the home phone contact number. I picked up the receiver and began dialing the seven digits.

Five rings resonated through my ears. After the fifth, a voicemail came on.

"Hey it's Kit!" Silence ensued after the first line and I began to wonder if Taniyama-san changed her phone number. "C'mon Mai, we've rehearsed this. Say your name." The same voice as before giggled, urging the other girl to speak. "Who am I again?" My eyes slightly widened. That was… "Mai," The girl sighed, "Your name is Taniyama Mai." "Oh…yeah," the other girl spoke quietly. I sat on the edge of my seat now, holding the phone close to my ears. She still sounded as young as before. This must've been an older voicemail…"And I'm Mai," Taniyama-san added softly, her voice barely above a whisper, yet more confident now. "We can't get to the phone right now so please leave your name, number, and a message and we'll get back to you as soon as possible!" That was the first girl. The line, however, did not go dead afterwards. It lingered on for a few more moments and I just barley caught the, "Mai, don't touch the knives!" Before the phone cut to static. The operator came on and began murmuring the usual but I dropped the phone.

**Rinny: Ha! I bet you didn't expect this ending to the chapter! Not only a total cliffhanger, but exactly what I left you with last chapter. *snorts***

**Mai: … You awful creature.**

**Rinny: **_**Brilliantly **_**awful creature. *smirks* Guess you'll just have to wait until next chapter~**

**Mai: It took you an entire month to upload this one…**

**Rinny: *sweat drops* Not entirely my fault. I type off of a different computer, put it onto a flash drive, upload it onto my other one, and that's my process to upload. But SOMEBODY evil in my household misplaced my beautiful flash drive and it's taken me ages to find it! And don't even ask about my process, okay? Its long and difficult to explain -.-**

**Mai: Excuses are for losers. **

**Rinny: Okay **_**now**_** you're just copying my Spanish teacher from last year! *pouts* **

**Mai: True. *chuckles* R&R for this pathetic person.**

**Rinny: Be polite! **_**Please **_**read and review. *smiles and laughs* Hope it was good. Or amazing. Or maybe not good at all… Well, you're the reader…**


	4. Getting Together, Maybe

**Rinny: Hi guys(: Nice talking to you all again. Hope you all liked our last chapter of 'With Time'. **

**Mai: It was okay. **

**Rinny: Really? *eyes begin sparkling***

**Mai: Ha, no. **

**Rinny: *mouth hangs open* Why do you do that?**

**Mai: Because it's fun watching you suffer. R&R now. Disclaimer- dontplaywithlove does not own Ghost Hunt or anything in the content of these chapters. **

***With Time***

**Chapter Four-**** Getting Together…Maybe**

The sound of the operator coming on made me realize what was going on. I grabbed for the phone, which was unceremoniously dropped onto the floor, and brought it back to my ear.

"-Press two for more options. Press one to leave a voicemail."

My fingers moved accordingly, punching the one digit on the number pad. After a few seconds of quiet, a small beep let me know I could speak. I held the phone close to my ear and began.

***With Time***

_I looked around cautiously, soaking in my whereabouts. Another black void surrounded me, my body illuminated in a light, white glow. Footsteps clucked against the ground around twenty feet in front of me. Soon, the apparition of a young girl materialized. I blinked and stood up, steadying myself before taking my own steps forward._

"_Miharu," I said wistfully, my memory on the strange girl coming back._

_She smiled lightly and outstretched her hand. The clacking finally came to a halt as lightning like blue eyes struck me. Both her and I were of the same height and were standing nose to nose. The angelic girl smelt of newly budded roses. _

"_You have pretty eyes," I commented unconsciously. Suddenly realizing my error, pink tinted my cheeks and I looked down sheepishly._

_If possible, her smile broadened. "Thank you," she said. "But only here do they represent such a hue."_

_I tilted my head and furrowed my brows. "Here?"_

"_Yes, here. I've told you before, I have my own body in our human world but, unlike you, I also have another body in the spiritual realm. This is the appearance I take on as a survivor. "_

_My eyes dilated. Miharu stepped around me and as I went to turn, the entire scenery began changing before my eyes. My breath left me. What was once a place of nothing morphed into a wonderful, open plane of fresh green grass. The wind ruffled the peak of each blade, sending a large wave over the field. High in the sky was neutral pale blue, filled with bright white balls of fluff. Far off in the horizon I saw the tip of a town. Thanksgiving brown roof tops and smoke from small fires. Pink and yellow daffodils sprung happily from the ground as well, dancing as though today was a new day._

"_What is this?" I whispered, transfixed by such a sight._

_Miharu held out her arms and let the wind whip at her flowing hair and dress. "My home."_

"_Your home?" I asked. Such a beautiful place inhabited such a beautiful girl. The irony._

_She laughed heartily. "Yes, my home. Come, there is something I must show you." And then something changed in Miharu's eyes. Cheery and nostalgic feelings behind her palette painted irises shifted to longing and business. I stiffened._

"_Mi-Miharu? Are you…" I trailed off._

_The girl began taking steps forward, toward the town that appeared so small from here. "Am I?" I shook my head and remained silent. "Close your eyes, Mai." My eyes? I did as told. Seconds later, she spoke again. "Now open." And as soon as I did, that 'little' town was right before my feet and I was standing above its graveled roads. My eyes in took all of the medium sized houses, made of red brick and wood. People dressed in fancy dresses and tail coats, hair up in intricate styles, roaming around the streets. It was all very middle aged._

"_What year is this?" I gaped. Miharu ignored my question and grabbed my hand, pulling me along with her. The streets we walked on were made of gravel and pebbles of browns, oranges, beige, and whites. No one around seemed to notice our presence, which was apparently normal, but only was I startled when I passed through a woman with a particularly large bust. An odd warmth coated my insides for a few seconds until passing, and I observed the woman, dressed in a teal gown that dropped to her knees, tightening around her chest area, shiver throughout my transitory. I had known people feel a shiver when a spirit is in their presence or goes through them, but I'd never have guessed a spirit feels warmth while doing so. No wonder many people become possessed. The feeling, yet strange, brought on an unfamiliar comfort. And mysteriously enough, I wanted to experience it more. Another thought hit me and I began slowing down my pace, causing Miharu to literally drag me with her. Only spirits cause such commotion. But am I…? I shook my head. No. I remember reading a book once, its name I don't remember, but in it I recall reading that if a live person were to astral project, they'd be considered a spirit, for they'd be roaming the spiritual plane. But they wouldn't be dead. I let out a breath and felt a tug on my arm._

"_Mai, you're lagging."_

_I flushed and scampered next to the young girl. _

"_Where are we-"_

_Miharu sighed and came to a halt. I bumped into her back with an 'oomph'. "This was the day when I became a survivor. I just thought I'd take you somewhere special to me so we could talk. And so that you could remember."_

_My hand slipped out of hers. Remember? Survivor? I became lost in questions. "What is a 'survivor'?" I queried. _

"_Soon you'll learn. But not now," She said. Still confused, I just nodded. "Now, come. You have much to learn."_

***With Time***

I slapped the phone back onto the receiver. With a husky breath, I stood up and paced the room. Kit… Natsume Kintan. Who was she, really? I'd just gotten off the phone with the emotional woman. One thing was for certain; it was going to be a challenge getting Mai back. The question is, how far will everyone be willing to go to get her…? No, I shook my head. Mai meant a lot to not only Bou-san and Naru, but to all of SPR. There is no way they'll let her go for a second time. With new found promises, I sucked in a wisp of breath and began thinking of one more decision to make. To tell or not to tell?

I sat on the dark leather couch, one leg resting over the other, chin in hand.

I don't believe Noll would be too happy knowing of our predicament this early in the day, it being only three in the afternoon. A thought struck me and I looked up. "Tonight, at seven", I resolved. I'd be killing two birds with one stone. Not only will I be able to fill in the former co-workers, but I'd be able to break it to Noll, as well. And not only that, but I wouldn't have to face his wrath alone. Surely he will be upset. More than upset. In turmoil, maybe, or be in angst. I considered my options.

He'd be in both.

But then again, I can see a part of him lighting up inside. Even myself, I must admit, is more than relieved that Mai-san will be coming back. Or at the very least, we'll be able to see her again. And that alone will be enough to warm everyone's hearts. I smiled lightly. She was one girl that we just couldn't seem to shake. She left a special place in our hearts, a place that can never be replaced or forgotten. I recall the time she made us all sit down to watch an English children's movie, to help her learn the English tongue in a 'fun' way. Lilo and Stitch the Movie, I believe, and just like the movie, 'Ohana means family, family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten'.

***With Time***

A deep toned, muscular voice started talking, "Tani- Mai. It's Lin. And Naru. We're both back in Japan and would like for you to stop by the office at seven tonight. If possible, that is. We…understand if you cannot make it, but Naru and I would be more than honored if you could. Please. I hope to see you then."

I frowned and bit at my lip, letting the cool black plastic linger against my ear for another second. Naru? That was Mai's boss from Japan… And Lin. Mai never went into detail about them because of the suffering it brought her, so I'm not too sure about who these people really are. They sound genuinely kind and caring for my little Mai but…but seeing them-

I vigorously shook my head. No, Mai would surely break down seeing them. This I know. But she can't continue living on in this shadow of fear. Fear needs to be faced, confronted, fixed. Mai's fear is more than just a simple detest for spiders, though. I should know that best. I nibbled on my lip and placed the phone against my shoulder, leaning back and peering into the bedroom.

Asleep.

Good, she was still asleep. My hands trembled with anticipation as I hit the redial button on the phone. I took the handset and put my back against the cream color wall, sliding down until I was sitting against it, feet laid straight out in front of me, crossed.

"Hello?" A male voice inquired. The same male voice.

I coughed once, loosening up my voice from the tension. "Yes? Is this a Lin…Kouho?"

"Koujo. May I ask who's calling?" I silently scolded myself. Of course it was Koujo. The fact that I had already mistaken his name only added to my worry. All traces of care in his voice seemed to vanish while talking to me. I mentally cursed and tightly gripped the receiver.

"My name is Natsume Kintan. Mai-chan…calls me Kit. I received your voicemail earlier…." I wavered, unsure what to say.

"Natsume-san. Might I ask your relation to Ta- Mai-san?" He asked.

I exhaled a breath. It seemed I'd have to just get to the point. "I'm sure you'd like the full story short, then. From what I know, you lot left Mai alone. She became mentally ill, depressed, and began cutting herself."

I paused and listened as this man's breathing hitched slightly.

"She nearly died from blood loss but was luckily found by her landlord and taken to the hospital. Eventually she ended up in a mental institution where she met me. To this day, she still has awful visions, or dreams, in which she relays someone's death. Mai is in an appalling condition to the point where she has seizures at times. She eats nothing but melon bread and therefore has terrible health problems. Taniyama Mai is sick in the head. Like I once was, she was –and still is- mentally unstable. We live together now and both attend school. I've been keeping good care of her," I slurred, choking on small sobs.

"…Who are you?" He asked curiously.

I cleared my throat, speaking slowly, "Natsume Kintan. Age 20. Guardian of Taniyama Mai. Orphan. Third year in high school. I'm the one who's been watching this precious girl- watching over her. And where- where were you?" I cracked. My entire voice broke down into silent tears.

"Where were you when- when this fragile girl, so young and b-beautiful, needed you most? She was a wreck! She _is _a wreck! God- this girl…she's like a rag doll. Kicked around and-and beaten down by life. She _needed_ you. Now she can't even think about her past without having a breakdown! You've caused her so much-so much _pain_," I hiccupped, sloppily wiping away my tears.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

"Yeah," I laughed angrily. "So am I. So the _hell_ am I."

"She could've lived a normal life…But you took it from her," I whispered. "She's dead inside. She's gone, yet still here," I said playfully, darkly. "You stole everything she had by leaving. There is no way in hell she's going to come see you scum. No _effing_ way."

Then I laughed. More like a depressed chuckle mixed with a hiccup.

The man whispered, "You said she'd breakdown. What did you mean?"

I sobered up for a second and glared forebodingly at the ceiling. "That is what I mean. It starts with all of these headaches, which leads up to internal aches, then comes the flood of memories which she later can't –or won't- recall, after she'll start the crying and screaming and sometimes the blood, and from there it's mass chaos."

Lin Koujo remained quiet for who knows how long before saying, "Please bring her. Naru…he needs her. We all do."

I guffawed grimly, "_You_ all need her? Bull shit! Didn't you listen to a word I said? _She can't._ She really can't… She really… Seeing you will hurt her more. I saw- I found her lying in blood and puke on the bed the other night. She'd seen a group photo of you all. That's all it took for her. I told her she was out for two days or so. I lied. She was- oh god. Mai-chan was practically out in a coma for five days!"

"Blood. She was coughing out blood- and for _God's sake_, she was puking!" I sniffled, picking up the nearest object and tossing it as far as I could in a random direction. The thing seemed to have been a stray pillow cushion, which thumped against the kitchen counter and fell to the ground.

"Please, Natsume-san. I beg you. Just- one week. In one week have her meet with us."

I pushed my knees farther into my chest and dipped my head down to meet them. "One week would never be enough."

"Please." The desperation, the reality that this man might lose my little girl forever if he weren't able to see her again, filled my head. I grit my teeth and let my tears go. For Mai. "One week," I said through clenched teeth. "But I'm telling you now, if you hurt her more than in the past, I will personally see to it that you never find her _ever_ again." With that I let the phone drop after ending the call and really began to cry.

All that's left to do now is wait. With time, we'll see what happens.

**Rinny: Oh, intense stuff. *shivers***

**Mai: Dip wad, you're the one who wrote it. *rolls eyes***

**Rinny: Still, it's intense. O.o**

**Mai: Okay then… R&R!**

**Rinny: Yeah, R&R! Please (:**

**PLEASE OH PLEASE READ: VERY IMPORTANT!**

**Rinny: And I know this chapter is, like, SUPER SHORT, but I felt bad not updating since forever ago, and its Christmas, so Merry Christmas! Thank you as well for all of the lovely reviews. I promise that chapter fiver will be at least five thousand or so words and I'll get it updated in less than a week! Just got my own laptop ( first one ) FINALLY so it'll be much easier to upload and less of an arduous task for me. Expect an update soon guys, and Merry Christmas!**


	5. Behind Your Back

**Rinny: So this is a little exciting... First chapter being written on my new laptop *smiles*And as promised, a long chapter has been provided for your reading entertainment. **

**Mai: Good, lazy good for nothing.**

**Rinny: Hey! I try *pouts***

**Mai: Well clearly not enough. Disclaimer: dontplaywithlove does not own Ghost Hunt or anything in the content of these chapters.**

**Rinny: *sigh* Always straight to the point with you…**

***With Time***

**Chapter Five-**** Behind Your Back**

_Miharu grabbed for my limp hand once more, pulling me along until we reached a particularly large cabin. Or I should say castle. My eyes danced in amazement, mesmerized by the sight of such beauty. Long vineyards wound their way from the very tops of the castle, all the way down to the over grown grass. The bricks which encased the home were faded whites and browns, and the tops swiveled up into the types of places in princess movies, where people like Rapunzel are trapped all the way up. Awaiting their knightly prince to come rescue them._

_Miharu laughed lightly and I glanced at her. She let a ghost of a smile pass over her before shaking her head and continuing on in._

_Past the numerous people, dressed even more fancily than those on the streets, and even guards, sporting long black tail coats and rifles, we galloped straight into the palace. It was magnificent to think that someone actually lived in a place like this… The thought of it was just so…majestic. _

_On more than once account, I had the chance to relay passing through bone and flesh, warming me tender. If I didn't stop soon, it'd become an addiction. I smiled. _

_Unobtrusive sounds gathered around us. As the silence engulfed us even more, I realized something somewhat crucial. It alarmed me that I could not completely make out what the people were saying. Their words came off distorted, and I caught only snippets of my language. I glanced up at Miharu. She seemed so lost in thought… I bit my lip and decided it best not to interrupt her thinking to ask._

_All seemed tranquil. Despite the meaningless sounds around us, the atmosphere was fairly normal. The humming of birds barely resonated in the air, and it was chilly. It seemed to be about mid-spring. I smiled. Spring was always my favorite season- a smooth transition from winter to summer. Where it wasn't too hot or too cold, and you could leave the air off and open up all the windows inside. We continued on in peace for another ten minutes or so. I wiped at my brow. This castle was very large… And everywhere we went, people engulfed the area._

_Suddenly, a large screech claimed the air. I dropped to my knees and slapped my hands over my ears. Miharu did the same. As I peeked an eye up, I noted that the living seemed to be unaffected and unaware. In a matter of seconds, the obnoxious shriek came to a halt. Miharu grew rigid and forcefully griped my wrist, running full feet up a pair of circular stairs that were secluded in a corner inside the tower. My own feet stumbled and tripped over one another._

"_Miharu! What was that?" I yelled out, trying my best to follow behind._

_She huffed and we continued skipping up the never ending stair case. "Let's just say you don't want it to find us. Let's play hide and seek, shall we?" _

_I furrowed my eyebrows and stopped, ripping my arm away from her. She halted, flying forwards a little before turning around astonished._

"_Mai! We don't have time for this."_

_I was tired of being left in the dark. A small part of me was really irked. I can understand why she'd not tell me some things, yes, but others, like being a survivor or this screech, I don't. I groaned internally. I was being childish. But I felt like I couldn't go on without knowing._

_Miharu plunged for my arm once more, grabbing it with success. I attempted to pull away, but I soon found out how deathly her grip was. A ripple of fear shot over me. I could feel the beginning of what will surely be dark bruises on my wrist tomorrow. How could someone so fragile be so strong?_

"_Mai, we don't have time. Whatever it is, you can ask me later," She breathed._

_I stood my ground, stopping my struggle to free my arm, and locked eyes with the mysterious girl. "I refuse to leave until you tell me what that screech was."_

_She did a double take before releasing her hold on me. I gratefully pulled my arm back and rubbed the sore spots, wincing._

"_Fine. You want to know? Its hell. Literally, it is hell itself. What do you think wiped away my entire village! That's how I became a survivor, Mai. I'm the only one who survived," She choked, turning away. "And because of it, I've been living immortally for the past couple hundred years, waiting for you."_

_I let out a puff of air and became still. Her entire village was…? I remember Miharu telling me this was her home…. Her home ... Oh my god. I put my hand to my mouth. _

_She turned her back to me slowly and said in a low voice, "If you want to survive then come on. I'll only say it once more; we don't have much time."_

_I stood still for another second before nodding. "Okay," I whispered._

_The entire climb up, guilt ate away at me. How could I do that? And what did she mean, waiting for me? I mean, I wasn't anything special. I was just a girl. What could I possibly possess that has made the blue eyed wonder want to wait for me? _

_Not only that, I chided myself. I of all people should know what it feels like to lose someone so precious. But in her case, not only has she lost loved ones, but the place she once called home. I suppose I, too, have lost my home, but again I found one with somebody who cared for me. After she left I ended up alone, but still in place of a home. Miharu…died. I think. I'm still unclear on what being a 'survivor' really is, so I guess I don't know. And I'll never know unless she tells me, and not forcefully. I clenched my fist, making up my own resolve. My own resolve…_

_The sound of a door slamming open caught my attention. Miharu was positioned in front of an old wooden door, hastily creaking open, electrifying blue eyes wide in anticipation. Our breaths were uneven and shallow, hair askew from the run. _

"_C'mon," She moaned. I took her outstretched hand and was shortly after rocketed forward, falling to the floor in pants, lungs in need of air. In our hast pace, she swung the door shut and began bolting the locks. After finally regaining some strength, I wiped the cold sweat off of my forehead with my backhand and took the chance to look around. My eyes briefly glanced at the area, nearly satisfied with just knowing it was a normal middle age room, until I spotted a familiar, flustered face sitting not too far off on an elegant fainting couch._

_Confused, I twirled my head around to find Miharu speedily pushing pieces of furniture against the rickety brown door. I looked back at the girl before me, eyes wide._

"_W-Who are you!" The frightened young girl answered. I stood still, mouth open but unsure what to say. The better question would be me asking her. Another thing that vexed me so, was the fact that with this girl I could clearly make out every sound, every syllable, that she mouthed. A shiver blanketed my spine._

_Seconds later, I presume Miharu turned around, for when she did, the mystery girl nearly fell from her seat. She clutched the ivory green cushion and stared in disbelief. Miharu took a few steps forward until she was standing calmly next to me. _

"_So you actually _can_ see us…" She murmured in thought. _

_I glanced confoundedly at her. Did that mean Miharu had been planning coming here this whole time….? It even makes me wonder if she knew that that screech was fated to be belt out. I clenched my fists and looked down. Gathering myself, I inhaled a steady breath and looked back up, slowly sedating myself._

_It was unbelievable, what I saw before me. That was for sure. But my companion seemed unphased, unlike minutes earlier. In light off all that's gone on, she seemed to regain all composure right at this second. I swallowed the lump in my throat and blinked. Surprisingly, the only thing I could think of at the time was the fact that I hadn't dreamt of death in a few days. _

"_Mai, this is…"_

***With Time***

I finally collected myself off the ground, wiping randomly at the stray pieces of hair sticking to the salty, warm tears against my cheeks. My uniform was a crinkled mess and all together, _I _was just a crinkled mess. I cringed and tip toed into Mai and I's bedroom. She lay still on the bed, her breathing a bit shallow, but other than that fine. I smiled sadly. She was such a precious girl… I shook myself of my thoughts and reached down into our dresser for some fresh house clothes and undergarments. I came back up holding clean underwear and a bra, black ankle tights, a tank top and a bumble bee yellow hoodie. As I began creeping out the door, I took a last glance at Mai. She was in the middle of shifting positions, a small, pained mewl rolling out of her lungs. Suddenly, a soft thud hit the floor. I looked down around the bottom of our bed and surely enough found a pen skittering across the floor. After it came a folded piece of paper, tumbling down gracefully. Curiosity got the best of me and I walked leisurely towards the sheet of creased paper, picking it up gently.

My fingers moved accordingly, unfolding the lined card. As I did so, another small letter drifted down to my feet. I peaked at it before bending down and picking it up, holding it up to the piece of paper and observing. My eyes skimmed over the letter, growing wider by the second. With more of a need to know what was going on, I tucked the letter under my arm and began reading through Mai's sheet of paper. My mind stumbled to catch up with this new found information. I looked incredulously at the sleeping figure only feet away.

"Mai… What are you…" I trailed off.

I looked back at the documents I held and tossed my clothes to the side. Without watching where I was going, I blindly walked through our small apartment to the couch, tucking my legs underneath me as I sat. Mai seemed to be decoding something… something… Oh! I sat each sheet of paper on the small, wooden coffee table, side by side. I read over the strange letter again and looked back at Mai's decoder sheet. She copied the first two sentences of the letter, 'I've been watching, oh I have been watching. Watching you like you would a new baby bird,' and above those two lines scribbled, 'Someone has been intently keeping watch over me'. Next was, 'I see your pain and I notice your fears, so close and dear and scariest here- where your memories are held and time takes place, a land not of crisped, tiny snowflakes,' which translated into, 'This person knows what I've been through and how I feel. They know my fears and feelings are hidden in my mind. They know it's not a good place'. 'But a place for evil and dread will lurk, haunting your past, present, and- Your future once bright now wallows in misery, but meet an angel to save its' history,' and after that Mai hurriedly jotted down, 'My mind is a scary place. Something is controlling my future with the past and present. Someone pure will help me'. That's all she has written for now.

I bit my lip and shoved the letter back inside the decoder sheet, following the folds consequently until it was back to its original, folded shape. I shakily laid it on the table and closed my eyes to think. What did this mean? An angel…? The whole thing made me uneasy. A small rumble settled in my stomach and it all made me feel sick. I unevenly grabbed the papers once more and unfolded, giving it once last thought before walking over to our school computer. I booted it up and opened our scanner. It was an old and ratty thing we stumbled upon on our way home from school, laying against someone's trash can. As the scanner loaded, I set both sheets side by side inside, closing the top on our century old machine. It beeped and groaned and I let my fingers move over the mouse, clicking the appropriate settings before hitting 'scan'. In-between the cracks of our scanner, a bright red light flowed out. The light slowly turned from the left to the right and back, then stopped. I opened the top and took out the papers, re folding them as our printer spat out a copy of each sheet. I closed out of the scanner tab on our PC and yanked the copies out of the dusty printer. I crumpled them in my hands and thrust them into my school bag, taking Mai's originals and setting them back into her hands.

"I hope you'll tell me soon, Mai-chan," I whispered, picking back up my clean clothes and leaving to shower. I inhaled a breath and straightened my back. I regret nothing. I just hope I can help her. A silent tear traced down from the corner of my eye. My feet paused at the doorway.

"Why do we keep secrets, Mai? " I queried, even though I knew she was deep in a REM sleep by now. "I suppose it's…human nature, isn't it?"

***With Time***

The chime to SPR rung once more, and the last person to arrive smiled brightly at the nostalgic feeling in the air.

"Yasuhara!" Bou-san smiled, patting his old friend on the back. The near-graduate laughed and was lead over to the couch where everyone sat, chit chatting about their lives since they had split apart. Naru and Lin sat patiently as well, sipping the tea that didn't seem to be as good as it had only a few years prior.

Ayako stretched out, surprisingly in a joyous mood, "It's been so long! This is…great!"

John nodded in approval, voicing his own thoughts in that Kansai accent everyone seemed to miss, "Except…where's Mai-san?"

The room grew quiet and Lin coughed. "Yes. I'd like to discuss with you that matter after Naru goes over the proposition for you all."

Naru's eyes narrowed at Lin suspiciously. "Of course. As obvious as it is, SPR will be re-opened."

Cries of cheer and high fives echoes against the walls. It was only until Naru cleared his throat when the silence ensued once more. "I'd like to hire you all as part timers here, if you're up to it. There will be a weekly salary of one fifty, extra if we are provided with a case."

Bou-san whistled, "I don't know if Daddy is supplying you this money or what, but that is an awful lot, Naru. Of course, I'm not just in it for the money! It'll be nice to be reunited with the old gang!" He smiled and put one arm around John, the other wrapped over a shocked Masako.

Naru sighed and rested his chin in his hand, legs crossed. "If you'd let me finish."

The monk sheepishly laughed and rubbed the back of his head. Naru continued talking. "You will join any case I deem is in need of your assistance. When called, you will come in to work immediately. Filing is normally Mai's modus operandi*, so you needn't do any paper work. It is also required that each week you provide me with a case. Whether we take it or not is up to me. If anyone cannot meet these standards, you are obligated to leave now."

No one stood.

"Good. Lin," He motioned for his older assistant to begin.

The stoic man sucked in a breath. Lin Koujo never gets nervous. Ever. But for once in his life, he felt unsure. Not so much unsure as he was anxious. Anxious about how everyone would take the news. Mostly Naru, for that fact. Knowing that their ex-subordinate and close friend was in the condition she is in now, and they might not get her back, is quite stressful.

Lin gave everyone a blank look and turned his head away from his desktop screen. The room grew rigid in silence, and the tension in the air seemed so thick you could almost grab it right from your hands.

"Mai-san has been through a…obstacle in her life. A large one." He started, hesitant on which way to go with this. "She nearly died due to…blood loss." At least that part was true, he thought hopelessly.

Before he could finish any more, Naru interrupted him. "Lin, please get to the point. Why is Mai absent today?"

Lin cursed himself on the inside. Naru was not a patient man at times. Especially when it came to knowing things, and Mai. The two combined, and you've got a hell of an intolerant man.

"She is not here with us tonight because of various reasons. The main one being the fact that she's mentally ill. On another note, we've been given one week until we are able to see her. If we hurt her, than the consequences are vast."

Bou-san sucked in a breath, taking this all in. "What are the consequences? Hurt her how? And who…is giving us a week to see her?"

Lin Koujo locked eyes with the bassist/monk. It was then that Houshou understood. This was more than serious. Lin cleared his throat and said ruefully, "We will never, ever, be able to see or contact Mai Taniyama ever again."

"How we could hurt her is something you must see yourself. As for who? Natsume Kintan, also known as 'Kit' by Mai-san. They met in a mental institution three years ago. She is twenty years of age and attends school with Mai-san, presumably making up for her years of high school missed. She is also Mai-san's legal guardian."

The quiet ate away at the joyful tone in the air. Nobody spoke, nobody moved. After a near two minutes of deep pondering and silence, John shifted in his seat. Masako raised her kimono sleeve to her mouth as a silent tear ran down her cheek. The medium may have been rough to Mai, but they were rivals in love. She had always secretly cared for the reckless girl, and hearing of the upbeat teen being 'sick' caused nothing but pain for her. Mai was someone who you just couldn't ever imagine being…like that. Bou-san was next to speak, lowly giving a sad laugh, trying to ease the pressure.

"You're actually calling her Mai-san… It used to be 'Taniyama-san'. Have you gotten softer in these past three years Lin?" The small smile was soon wiped from his face. As it became evident the grown man was about to break down at any moment now, Ayako came first, hiccupping a sob. All eyes averted to her and she quickly drew her hand over her mouth, trying to suppress the cries, failing terribly. Everyone was in pain at the news, as little as they knew compared to Lin. Bou-san laid a hand over her shoulder and gave her a meaningful look, then suddenly, she cracked.

"Oh god," she bawled.

Lin gave her a sympathetic look, something of a rarity. Most often, he could care less for the human things such as sickness or laughs or feelings. But now, it was different. When you've grown so close to a person, as though they were a leach fighting to stick, it's hard to shake them. Oh so hard. He couldn't bring himself to tell her, to tell anyone, that it was much worse than he had made it sound. But really, when someone hears of a close friend nearly dying and then becoming mentally ill, it'd be a lot on anyone.

The man looked up discreetly, sneaking a small peak at his boss.

Naru.

His face remained unaltered, staring blatantly nowhere. But he knew, he saw. That inside, reflecting off of his icy blue eyes, the grief, the pain, the heart break. But most importantly, he saw determination. Lin tried to look deeper inside the boy, to find whatever it was he was thinking at that time. But to no avail, it was impossible. He inaudibly turned back to everyone else. John had his eyes closed, saying a small prayer. When he opened them once more, he gave a dejected smile.

"We mustn't mourn over what has happened, but rejoice in the fact that we will see her soon. Mai is strong, and we must believe she will fight the bad inside her heart and find her way back to us. We have one week upon seeing her. Let's use this time to strengthen ourselves for when she comes. It'd be bad if we broke down into tears the moment we were to lay eyes on her."

This little bit of inspiration from the priest lightened the mood.

Yasuhara said strongly, "I suppose he's…right." Then smiling desolately in remembrance, he looked up at the ceiling. "You know, I haven't kept in touch with her since we all split apart. She never answered her phone or her door."

A waver of thought passed over the group. In truth, they'd all attempted to get in touch with their favorite teen girl, but it'd been so darn difficult. Eventually, most believed she moved away somewhere and found it unmanageable to find her. They searched, yes, but came up with no results. Mourn they did for whatever period of time, a month or so, before realizing they mustn't be lament, but happy for the girl who will forever remain in their hearts, and move on.

But now that they knew, that she was near, that she'd had so much happen to her while they did nothing…it was unbearable. So many written off feelings came back to them then, along with new ones.

Lin awkwardly sat, keeping a steady look and his mask of impassiveness up.

After a steady moment of thought, Naru shifted in his seat. "What Mai has done up to now must wait. As concerning as it is, we have other matters to attend to." He flashed Lin a nod of appreciation before stoning his features once more.

"Our first case back in Japan. To me it appears to have a simple solution that I plan on proving. It's out a ways- a small village in France. It's said to be a national landscape, and all construction on this site was forbidden. Until recently, a suspicious man has become mayor of a neighboring town, and after two years of pushing, the government has enabled him to do what he wished with the land and has extended the perimeter of his town. I've gathered background information on the history of the land which you'll find in the folders in front of you."

The man gave everyone a moment to collect themselves and their feelings, and pick up a folder. He saw in each one of them how pained they were, and he swore to make that pain go away. The longer they lingered on the topic, the more irrational he became, and that was the last thing he needed to happen now. They'd get Taniyama Mai back if it was the last thing they'd do, but for now, he needed to avert his mind.

He was albeit astonished no one argued changing subjects, but then again, he found it understandable why they _wouldn't _push the matter.

Clearing his throat, the calm man continued, "Read along as I speak get a better understanding of what we'll be working with. Around three to four hundred years ago, there was a small village in Marseille, France, and is the oldest village in that country. Normally, villages have an elected mayor of some sort, or a family line of leaders for that village. This particularly village –Les Voix- had a royal family, and their heir, most commonly a female, ruled the village. Its name translates to 'the voices', and is of French origin. It doesn't surprise me, considering it's located in France. Thankfully for most of you, France is a bilingual country, so as long as you speak either English or French, communicating will be a menial task."

A few squirmed slightly, embarrassed that they spoke neither language. Naru held in a breath.

"Les Voix was a quiet place with quiet people. Ironic, bearing in mind the village name. Occasionally, in honor of 'the voices', which was referring to voices everyone in the village could supposedly hear, they'd hold large festivals. How odd it is, though, that no outsider has ever been able to make out the voices the villagers hear," he stated confidently.

Naru crossed his legs over and rested his elbows on each knee, fisting his linked hands and graciously laying his chin atop of them. Sending a quick look everyone's way, he went on. "Now back to present time. I'll brief you in on the occurred 'hauntings' and I'll leave the rest of reading the background of Les Voix to you all. The villagers inhabiting Les Voix, which is now an extended addition to Sans Àme, claim to hear unbearable shrieking late at night. Along with that, they feel a distinct rumble every afternoon at exactly two on the dot. At times, an apparition of a large castle is seen on the hill. Every time, a young girl wearing renaissance style clothing is spotted at the peak of the castle, through a window on the crowning of a spiral. She looks to be crying, blood staining her body, screaming, 'Why? Please help! Why are the voices hurting us?'. After a few minutes, the vision disappears. It materializes every day, at the end of the rumbles at two o' clock. Back to Sans Àme, do any of you have a clue what it means?"

Masako quietly spoke, "What what means, Naru?"

He straightened his back and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back in the chair. "I mean, do any of you know what Sans Àme translates to?"

Yasuhara bravely interrupted, lifting his glasses ever so slightly. Barely above a whisper, he said, "I took French my third year of middle school. Correct me if I am wrong, but I believe it means 'without soul'."

Impressed, Kazuya Shibuya replied, "Very good. Make as many connections as you all can from the names 'San Àme', and 'Les Voix'. I have no more to say on the matter. Be sure to look at pages five to eleven in your folders, it'll come to your advantage to know what is written there. Any questions?"

Lin closed the front of his laptop and stood, tucking it between his arms. "Come back tomorrow around noon for a lunch meeting."

This small invite seemed to loosen the tension in the air. Everyone broke out into a small smile. Well, until the clumsy monk spoke out.

"What about Mai?"

Everyone grew silent once more. Ayako, without looking, kicked Bou-san's foot. He looked to her in shock, rubbing his leg.

"One week," Naru stated, standing himself now. With his back turned, he finished, "Like Lin said, one week."

***With Time***

I jolted awake. A small sweat covered my brow. As I moved to sit up, an unbearable pain overcame me. I gasped and thumped back on the bed.

"Woah," I whispered, staring up at the ceiling. My eyes widened more and I lifted my weak fingers to barely graze my throat. A raspy voice and brittle body. I could also feel heavy bags under my eyes, even though I've probably been asleep for longer than necessary. My fingers dropped onto my stomach.

Huh. In the spiritual realm I am completely healthy, yet out here, I'm nothing but an empty body.

The dark pupils engulfed in my autumn irises dilated and my jaw hung slightly ajar. I could feel a slight constriction in my throat and urged myself not to cry. I should be used to being like this by now, even if I could normally at least _move_. But I guess after you taste a piece of heaven, there's no forgetting what it's like. And suddenly…I yearned to be back asleep, where I am the person I was before all of this happened. Where I could laugh and walk and run and jump and scream and smile and _be happy. _I longed for my happiness again.

"Well," I chafed, choking on a small sob. "This sucks."

**Rinny: I know! I know! I know! I feel awful I haven't updated in THREE MONTHS. I know! I'm so sorry!**

**Mai: … You deserve no reviews.**

**Rinny: NOO I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY!**

**Mai: Plus this chapter SUCKS BALLS.**

**Rinny: *crying* I'm sorry! I know!**

**Mai: *crosses arms* !#$ off.**


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